scream when you have to, to let go.

2010-03-16T00:14:00.001+08:00

i was told to stop silat. hur.

2010-03-11T00:33:00.002+08:00

i get injured almost every training. it sucks because it really hurts. last week i stubbed my freaking second toe on the steps. it was swollen the night, less swollen the morning and stopped swelling. about a month and a half ago or two, i injured my left knee. and the injury keeps coming back. intially when i run or jump then it'll start to hurt quite badly. i stayed off jumping for a while it seemed better. now better but when i walk, sometimes, i'll be in like falling motion but halfway because my knee gave way. the physio told me i have weak knee and needed to go to the gym bla bla and run. i have tendonitis which he claimed was easy to tackle. so physio sessions were not just left knee and ultrasound but includes my right ankle (i didnt want to tell him it hurt both sides). first session he IT band-ed my left thigh but OMG IT WAS #$%( PAINFUL. i wanted to scream out expletives but decided otherwise and just muttered ow ow ow ow ow. it was supposed to be better. until ytd he it band-ed my thigh again and it was WORSE WORSE. ))): he pressed some part of the knee which never hurt before but it did ytd. )))): tonight im trying to sleep without curling my legs or bending it.

i thought physio sessions are a waste of $20per session. but right now, i'll be grateful if mr physio could come help me out now.

a knee injury is just as bad as a sprained ankle. leaves you crippled and keeps coming back. sucks.

if only the day has more than 24 hours, we'd all be happier people. :D

i've been studying and i get sleepy by the time i reach home and have my dinner. like right nw. ahahhaha

ok! goodnight!

2010-01-08T13:56:00.002+08:00

well hello.

today is the very first day i stayed at home after zohor doing nothing but sitting in front of this laptop of mine playing bejeweled blitz over and over. but alas. it's so damn hard to beat scores that soars to as high as 400000. so, congratulations to myself! but i cannot beat the record of staying home on a weekdays without touching the front door the entire day. there's silat barbecue at labrador park tonight. makes me think twice about going because my dad didnt really say a yes. so. hur.

i started the year of 2010 on the bed whiling my time away. so far, all's good! i had a badminton (which i generally suck at) game yesterday with maths kids and their other halves. yay! we should play more badminton next time! or lets try something else? and hafiz will go buy kites for us at marine parade for $2 and we shall go marina barrage ok! :D the last time i flew a kite was...i dont remember.

of 2009.

main achievement: cap up! and pulled off a shocking A for soci. HAHAHAHA. insya'Allah, if i continue to work hard with saliman's "belajaaaaar!!", i will continue to push my cap up for the next three semesters and possible do honours. all these will require lots of energy. and thank you saliman!

let's go by halves.

1st half 2009: lots of playing. not good. nevertheless no more Ds (dang that linear algebra) in my results. school was a lot more socializing and studying sat somewhere mid priority until the exams drew near 2 weeks before. not good. holidays was....ivp! :D which turned out ooooookay. cant wait for next ivp. had a bigger smile then and concentration was really off.

2nd half 2009: major withdrawal from play. good but not good. more consistent in work and more focused. still cant challenge the long attention span of somebody else though. smiled less due to tiredness, stress and i cant think of other reasons right now. but results wise, much better and now reaping the effects of better results. (: thoroughly enjoyed my holidays. travelled far and wide. ok rubbish. to batam and kl only.

ok. im done. resolution for this year is still being considered.

but target for next semester: continue what i did last semester. OMG. ))))))): okay. lead a balanced lifestyle. dont forget play. shop only when necessary; excludes weekly or bi-weekly window shopping. save money wherever possible. always been doing that anyway. watch movies only when the show looks good. HAHAHAHA. be more active and not passive. smile more.

♥

to faz. omg i havent seen since i dont know when. not that i've forgotten you. )):
to dianah. i'm not free on tuesdays and fridays. other days sounds perfect. :D
to farah hidayati and soefie. i will lunch with you at least once a month in school.
to abg mi. bila nak belanje ni!! (not like u read this anyway HAHA)
to silat. i will put in more effort. i try.
to fad. we should stop typing typos.

2010-01-03T14:18:00.004+08:00

i was simply too busy or too tired or too lazy. but really, words dont come easy anymore. my brain is currently in melayu-habis mode.

jadi apa kata, kita tunggu sampai mode ini berlalu. maka, akan saya menulis tentang wawasan 2010 saya dan beberapa pendapat tentang tahun 2009 yang sudahpun lepas pada malam ini ataupun malam esok.

sekian. (:

HAHAHAA. nota untuk diri sendiri: tulis dalam bahasa melayu dah terabur haprak! sudahlah!

2009-11-09T12:30:00.001+08:00

we are all conformists. whether you like it, or not.

2009-11-02T23:30:00.003+08:00

i'm supposed to be doing my chinese but i'm procrastinating with blogging and icy tower, and eating keropok after a long time, and assessing the dryness of my face ever since i started using shokubutsu HYDRATING (bullshit) i'm going back to buy garnier, no matter how expensive it is, everything BUT chinese and tut 9 which was last week's tut. dammit.

but you know. it's not really bugging me. but it bugs. OK. and i hate bugs, especially in my room at night. i'm sure a lot of other people too.

sometimes i wish i had all the time in the world to do whatever i want. sometimes i want things to go my way and not sudden changes. maybe i'm not receptive, but i suppose i dont quite like spur of the moment stuff when i thought i had it all planned to the little bits. but when it goes POOF, my heart goes POOF, my mind POOFS too. and then i'll be in a daze. but i dont mind changes when i havent planned things by the minute kind of shit. unless it's minor changes. but really, i really can't stand it.

put it simply, my dad and i are ALMOST ALIKE. he's not receptive to changes at all. we must go in really slowly on him. otherwise he'll just reject it flat. but no, i'm not that hardcore. i would probably just live with the change surpressing inner feelings even if i don't like it, for the better good. initially i won't be able to receive it, but it takes a whole lot of effort to embrace that change and eventually come to terms with it or i'd have to psycho myself that the change was reasonable, good and advantageous.

well, i do a heck lot of psycho-ing. to myself only. that's been happening since, i cant remember when. secondary school?

herrrumpherrum.

anyway, i want to talk to you, but you know my ability to talk and churn out words regarding, is close to zilch. zero. naught. empty. kosong.
but i promise, i've been trying to understand you. (:

oh oh. this is really cliche. but really, i'm sure everyone has said this before in their lives.
"it's not you, it's me."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ok now really, CHINESEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

2009-10-23T22:50:00.002+08:00

here i am once again after a long long MIA.

im supposed to be studying ok. but one thing sparked off in my mind and i thought i want to share.

i think im exceedingly much quieter, more mature (though some may completely disagree), more self-keeping, less RAAAAH (since jc), less noisy (noisy with a few people only), less involved in school activities (given, it's such an independent system in school, i tend to detach myself from many things going on in school except bazaars(HAHA), to put it blatantly, i think im less energetic to involve myself anymore = lazy), you get the point.

is it the school system? my system? my new "go school, study, attend lessons, eat a little, go back, facebook, die in soci and maths tut, silat, weekends are...i dont know what happened to them" routine? or maybe i've grown. but why do i need a bib? ):

but what i dont understand is the change which gradually consumes me and changes me to a person, different at a whole new level (lower or higher, im not sure). in a way, im happy like this, but somehow, where's my vibe? i think used to be happier. so what's changed? ):

looking at pictures on facebook of friends, looking at pictures i took when i was young (ya alah macam tua sangat), reading at past entries on my blog (thanks), im much much less of a happiness-exuding person than i used to be.

wani said to me some three weeks ago, "nurul! why you look so sad? you used to be smiling all the time!"

then it became a thought provoking matter for me for the past weeks when i find time alone and as i try to understand and comprehend the change in myself. i wonder if everybody else changes in this direction as they age. i wonder if i am less happy now than i was before. but here's what i notice about myself.
1) im still the way i was when im alone. i sing, talk to myself, draw and doodle when some image comes into my head, i terkinja-kinja still and i like to laugh myself silly alone (ohmygod i sound mental)
2) i now have a different persona in public, compared to then.

does this mean or show being very mindful of how others perceive me to be changes me? i tak tau. ))): am i obsessed with "im an adult now i should behave" mentality? or aiyah society, why make me like this?? )))): now i blame society. dammit.

then now, here comes me thinking about loads and i cant express it to people, as i hide in my comfort zone where people dont scrutinize or judge me. i have this ugly impression of people that they are judgmental. maybe because sometimes i do judge people (like how i judged my laoshi's shoes just now). i need to delete "judgmental" out of my dictionary.

so now, i'm thinking, people who read this are going to judge what kind of a person i am.
so i tell you, no im not sad. i just dont understand why i turn out this way. what a contradiction.

on a side note, today has been terrible.
spilled chinchow, sugar washed jeans, my phone dropped twice, not eating much, i have a feeling people are scolding me a lot lately when actually they are not.

ah. life's complicated. what wani said made me realise of my reclusion.
ah. if only i wasnt such a thinker at certain times. or maybe this is effect of regular pms. shit.

2009-05-30T14:02:00.002+08:00

well, crazy weekends are here.
which i hope awfully lot that it's crazy weekend to SHOP. but i think i'd do better hoping for something else.

first crazy weekend: THIS WEEKEND! 30 MAY - 31 MAY
nenek's birthday, nyai's birthday, theme: RED; strawberries, glazed cherries, roses, shoes(? :D), red cake! find pantun, take photos and i hope i can make it for today's shoot. ((:

second crazy weekend: NEXT WEEKEND! 5 JUNE - 7 JUNE
it's pretty much just silat and my parents going to pulau terong for a wedding and bro undecided whether to go or not. if you're not going, you're veyr much invited and welcome to watch me play the suckiest game of my life. ))):

and papa said no painkiller injection, im sorry coach.

third crazy weekend: NEXT NEXT WEEKEND! 13 JUNE - 14 JUNE
it's ivp again! :D ok. hopefully many of us gets into finals (((: my parents will be off to sibu island/kelong for holiday. HAIYAAAAAA.

and im working!
1st, 22nd, 23rd, 24th june! @ $22/hr. ZOMMMGGGGGG. it sure beats getting $50 a week. ((:

and i really hope they're calling me for being a maths trainer at some school 9am-11am from 1st to 12 june. I WANT LEHHHH. )): BADLYYYYYY. SOUNDS LIKE GOOD MONEY SEHHH. haiya.

ok. time to rush off (again!) see ya. XOXO.

and oh, i one kanchiong spider esp when im late and i love to rush. OK MORE LIKE I AM OBLIGED TO RUSH. MAKING ME TO HAVE TO LOVE TO RUSH SO THAT I DONT COMPLAIN. HAIYAAA. wake up earlier la hakimah. prft. where's your discipline! TSKKKKKKK.

and i have a farah workout this week. and a badminton game this week. OMG I SUCK AT BADMINTON, YOU DONT KNOW HOW BAD I AM. i want to cry. for being sucky at badminton.

apa apa la. confidence mesti ada. cukup. yakin cukup.
tapi dalam papers niari headlines was: "YAKIN SAJA TAK CUKUP"
ABEH CAM NE....

2009-05-21T10:33:00.002+08:00

yay. (:

KRIS ALLEN WON.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

2009-05-07T00:03:00.003+08:00

dear friends,

it's the little things you do, you say, you hear, you see, you feel;
that is all that matters.

this is the time now to sit, breathe, and feel for what you want most.
you may not get what you want, but you can always hope for it;
because i know someone is there, listening to you, wanting to make it work for you.

well, i want to make things work too.

to all the friends that i've been missing out on, i hope to catch up with you this three months break. but if i dont get to spend my time with you somehow, do know i miss you like crazy till then.

just like when i spent time with my dear friends today, i feel at home though .. YEA you two know. tsk! but i genuinely love the time we spend together, even if it was just at the beach doing nothing but listening to the waves to calm ourselves down.

and you know the best part of spending with you kids today, was the process of making her present and walking with friends i know who'll stand by me anytime anywhere, always.

i love your company, i'll seek your company always.
if i cant be with you ladies physically, know that you are all in my heart.

till we meet again my dears. (i hope soon!)

XOXO,
love you loads dear friends.

p.s/ now now, dont cry, cos my tears can fall easily like that.

2009-04-24T00:07:00.004+08:00

SECTION B OF CS IS KILLER AND SCARING THE SHIT OUT OF ME.

JUST BY LOOKING AT THE "STORY" TO READ MAKES ME NAUSEOUS.

IF I CONTINUE ON TO WRITE OUT THE CODES, I WILL PUKE DISGUSTINGLY AND INDISCRIMINATELY ON THE PAPER.

I CANT WAIT FOR THIS Complete Stupidity/Shit/Spoiler TO BE OVER.

3pm this saturday. come celebrate with me. (:

XOXO.

2009-04-21T15:31:00.000+08:00

IM DONE WITH TUT 11 TOOOOOOOOO!

i feel productive today. so far. otherwise usually i wont get much done. ):

screams: WHOOOOOPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. ALHAMDULILLAH.

now im motivated to not fall asleep prematurely tonight.

XOXO.

2009-04-21T13:27:00.002+08:00

slow but progressing.

im on to tutorial 11! yes Yes YEs YES YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! :D :D

sorry, but i have to move on and leave you behind.
dont look back; jangan pandang belakang.

OK. MUG HARD AH.
and all the best to you fazliah! though i very much hate you to end when i start. basket.
LOVE YOU LOADS.

XOXO.

//but haiya cs like shit like that.

2009-04-18T22:52:00.002+08:00

i need to be in a "YOU MUST STUDY TO RAISE YOUR CAP IDIOT" mode.

but here i am..just completed writing a piece of music that sounds odd and praying that it'll pass.

damn.

ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR EXAMS LADIES!
and leaders of tomorrow. hee.

and gentlemen.

XOXO.

2009-04-07T17:10:00.001+08:00

it's sunshine after the rain. ((:

2009-04-07T16:34:00.002+08:00

on a day like this,
i feel down. why?
because it's raining.

i prefer sunshines.

i will give you back your shine.
once this rain goes away.

XOXO.

now, have you stopped to think?

much love all.

2009-02-27T15:32:00.006+08:00

i am SO WORN OUT. and hungry.

i want to er...
1) shop
2) cake-eating.
3) meet faz, soef, dianah, farah ASAP.
4) go cycling (WTH?! but yes i want to)
5) go picnic!
6) watch tv from morning till night
7) sleep a lot a lot.
8)...
9)...
10)...
.
.
.
.
.

oh the list goes on. i just want a freaking break. like HOLIDAY PLEASE.

mummy, i wanna go genting. i dont care if papa complains "asyik gi hoiday je!" but we hardly do! he's the one who's always golfing approx 2-3times a week! :\

IBUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.... KAKAK PENAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. ))))):

boohoo.

XOXO. (with much keletihan/kepenatan/kelelahan and ay498p1oqhrfdskjfg)

2009-02-23T16:10:00.003+08:00

my first full day at home on a weekday every since school started on 12 jan. (:
okay maybe not. going for a buffet later. that reminds me. i better charge the batt of my camera. hmmm.

so i stayed home today. with the idea that imgoing to spend the day with my family somewhere. turns out my mum wanted to eat sushi but since my dad went to work, another time. so she said choose to either go east coast then to parkway parade or changi beach then to airport. eventually she chose to go east coast. that was at 10.45 am.

at 11.30 am, she changed her mind (after some questions) and called up my dad: pa, tonight we go eat buffet at sakura can?

so we're going to eat buffet at sakura later for dinner. HMMM. how fast. so the rest of the day is spent at home studying. where i think if this was the original plan, i would have gone to school to study then meet them at sakura clementi woods later in the evening. HMMM.

so today, i watched oscar and listened to beyonce, spice girls, destiny's child, usher and britney. ahhhhhhhh. how nice. (:

and for the rest of the week, im gonna study hard. seriously. calculus needs some buck up and cs too. :||

i think i said that too many times but it just doesnt seem to be working. PRFT.

okayyyy.continue with calculus then get ready for buffet. see ya!

and im sorry my ladies. i find it hard to find time and meet you guys. )):

XOXO.

2009-02-18T00:15:00.002+08:00

i have the BIGGEST APPETITE in my entire life at this stage.
god, i just cant stop eating. it's been.....5? 6? 10? 11? how about many days? that all i do is eat and eat and eat.

a few days ago, my food intake was at intervals of maximum 45 mins, between one food and the next.
today, i had MEGA breakfast(cheap! $3.90 only!) at MEGAbites(oh that explains the name) which consists of:

1 chicken patty
2 sausages
1 hashbrown
scrambled egg
toast
some lettuce, tomato

at 940 am. i finished them all. CLEAN. saliman was pulling the last sausage and some egg away from me so that i wont eat it, and pushed all the vege to me. of course, i was merajuk-ing a while, cos i really wanted to eat it. but eventually he gave me back my beloved sausage.

at 11.30, i heard myself saying: I FEEL LIKE HAVING CHEESECAKE. from megabites. goddddddddddddddddd. luckily i could self-give a restraining order, else i would have bought it.

at 210pm, "im hungry! ):" at 3pm, "okay i go pray first and visit the coop a while! see you later!" and you know what, i went coop to get ice lemon tea and bee bee crackers. i was DAMN TEMPTED to buy the soft baked chunk cookies. GODDDD. restraining order again. :\
when i went home "bu, kakak lapar and haus. what did you cook?" reply was: oh we all ate maggi. you want maggi? "OKAY!" then, she forgot to put egg inside (didnt i have egg earlier!?), i was like "no egg eh? okay never mind. i wouldnt mind it if you cook me another one" WHAT THE HELL LA NURUL JUST SHUT UP AND EAT LESS.

slightly less than 2 hrs after the meal, "is there anything to eat apart from yoghurt?" DAMMIT. and you know what i saw? MAGGI OMELETTE or OMELETTE MAGGI, either way it's the same thing, on the table. my mum said: MMMM SEDAP. tak nak try, Mah? so with all smiles and glee i reached out for the fork and knife and popped a small portion of it in my mouth.

SEDAAAAPPPP GILAAAAA! and i continued eating it until i realised, "EH? DAH BIS?! SHIT!"
and her cookies were tempting tooooooo. she was eating it in front of meeee. tempting me to want to reach out for one cookie. but her cookie: eat one, want another. :\ but i gave restraining order again.

THAT'S 3 RESTRAINING ORDERS TODAY.

HAKIMAH, STOP EATING LIKE A PIG. I FEEL LIKE A BLOODY GLUTTON. :\
PUNYALAH BANYAK NAK LOSE WEIGHT, ABEH MAKAN MACAM ORANG GELOJOH. :\
SUDAHLAH!

but seriously, i NEED to lose weight. MANA TAK BONCIT! :\

and now i have the image of delifrance's chocolate mousse in my mind and im salivating.

TSKKK. tak boleh harap. :\

with babat and XOXO.

2009-02-09T00:27:00.002+08:00

yesterday was nus-sp friendly at sp t11a.
AND IM SLEEEEEPY. ):
i really have got no mood to talk about anything. honestly.
my mind is in a whirl twirl, girl.
this and that of everything.
IM STILL SLEEEEEPY. ):
cs lab is taking forever. 4 hours of task 2 and all my tests cases are wrong. boo. i feel cheated. i wanna sleeeeeeep. but but but but ive yet to finish task 3 (last one!) by mon noon.

oh. i bought alarm clock that blue and red and cost $7.90 from some shop at cck today. the alarm is irritating, noisy and LOUD. if i dont wake up to that, i dont know what to say seriously. hah. ive been sleeping like a log. not answering any wake up calls (up to 11 missed calls one morning!) or morning phone alarms (snoozed once and never manage to hear subsequent ones) though it's at....volume level 6! ohmygod. ):

till then, XOXO.

why do i feel like you're avoiding me?
i really dont know why.

2009-01-27T00:53:00.006+08:00

wow. if i were to blog about everything that has happened, i think this whole page wont cover.
so it's best if i let a several cover photos to speak for itself. (:
of course, there are many many more photos than there are here. (:

here goes.

EVA'S BIRTHDAY 22 JAN 2009

the trip to CHILDREN LITTLE MUSEUM

CIK AWO'S WEDDING 24/25 JAN 2009

finally..

PHOTOSHOOT WITH COUSINS 26 JAN 2009

2009-01-17T23:24:00.002+08:00

when we can both say, once upon a time.

i dont know if i can face you at the moment. but i'll have to. and i trust you will take this in hand. im not sure what your aim was and what you wanted from me. maybe you didnt want anything after all. but all i can do is to smile.

a promise is a promise. i can only shut up.

im sorry if you girls cant understand this post.

toodleloos!
XOXO

2009-01-15T23:56:00.000+08:00

hey all!
Im up n typing on my dad's phone. COOL? STYLO MILO!

Anyway, schl has officially started. Good week good week! Hmm. Lets see, lects right thru n nothing much else.

Wish i cld type more, but my dad wants t sleep, so gotta give tis back.

Nightynight all! Continue again when i get my laptop back from it coop. :\

LOVELOVE XOXO.

2009-01-04T15:19:00.000+08:00

status: EUPHORICAL!

2009-01-01T23:54:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 2009!

and so the new year has kicked in. im looking forward to a better year, a chance to improve myself and maintain happiness.

i havent got much resolutions mostly because i dont quite believe i'll be able to keep it. in any case, you dont need a new year have resolutions. they can just come anytime you feel you need that change for the better.

so one think that has been for me is to keep fit. i will keep fit and slay that cheesecake and cake gorging thing.ive been eating so much of that which explains the tummy i have now. :\

well, 2008 has been very much an eyeopener with many learning experiences and meeting many new people. i made improvements. being a better daughter, a better friend and most importantly a better muslimah. 2008 was a good year.

i met friends who are dependable and seriously funny and outgoing, never failing to make me laugh everyday. i did many things for the first time, and enjoying them. i went through an array of emotions which make me thing now that im not so much of an emotion-deficient kid. :D aint that good to know.

i managed to immerse myself into the malay community which was what i wanted after being detached from the malay community for so long. and it feels great. now to count non malay friends in nus, i think i can count with my fingers.

i remained a good friend to my ladies. and i hope we'll be able to keep this friendship strong and funny. we all have split personalities, amazing how we get along. i love you guys.

well, i sure do hope for a very good year ahead with You, You, You and You.

Ya Allah, i pray for the best of health and iman. I humbly pray to You, to give me strength to pull through and overcome difficulties that You may have set for me. I pray to You to bless my family and i with happiness, understanding and abundance of health and rezeki. May You lead us not to paths of those who go astray. Guide us along to be people of iman and taqwa. Only You know what is in my heart and what lays ahead of me. Bless me with Your rahmat ya Allah. Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin. Amin.

take care my dears.
XOXO.

2008-12-25T18:37:00.003+08:00

present day is here for many! :D

and so since you guys are getting lotsa presents, why dont you donate some to me. HEHE.

had a picnic today with my aunts,nyai and cousins! at east coast. LUCKY AH. not many matminahs around. glee. my cousin and i were like some childhood deprived kids playing with sand and colourful plastic pails. fun though. hahaha. frisbee and taiti and food. basic picnic details. ((:

bowling ytd. sucked big time. but the two guys were superbly cool or whaaaat. curl and slow balls. after which we went to eat at al-azhar. at the end of the day, we ended up in amk. LOL! how the hell did we get there in the first place huh. HUR. but it was a very pleasant day i must say! :D

tmr i need to shop. like really shop. must find clothes to wear for school next sem! :\ cousins day out cos faz and i cancelled on each other. that girl, she deserves a good smack. and she's planning to ambush me.

MAKNENEK NI MEMANG NAK KENAAAA!

ohshit! i forgot about the kiteflying thing! DAMN. k i better reply farah! sorrrrrrrryyy! i totally forgot! :\

two weeks. i better not count.

oh, christmas present! :D

XOXO

2008-12-21T00:10:00.000+08:00

i surprise myself sometimes.

2008-12-17T10:27:00.002+08:00

replies to tags!

-: who are you talking about and who are you?
farah: yes! you see your name darling! :D when are we to go out!
soef: eh! have a little trust babe! when are we to go out tooo!
theonewhocallsMEkentang: you took 9637328985490 years to find my tagboard! zomg. :D SHH LAH.
dianah: MONDAY MONDAY MONDAY MONDAY!
anonymous: you are?
eva: HEEEE. but i gotta take more more more photos soon! oh i decided to wait for christmas and see if i can get a better deal otherwise, im just buying the canon 85 unless someone wants to sponsor me the rest of the difference to buy the sony t77 ((:

2008-12-17T00:15:00.003+08:00

when you're happy and you know it you clap your hands. (:

okay. so the cat is out of the bag between me and fazliah. (: OI YOU. KEEP IT TO YOURSELF OKAY DARLING DEAREST! :D but im definitely a better secret keeper(own secrets!) than youuu! HEE

ive been going out everyday for the past few days and i foresee myself going out everyday for the next few days. ((:

but i cooked fried black pepper spaghetti for my bro today. mmm. i think it tasted good. (:

today was pretty much unexpected really. i thought ikea was the only place we'd go and possibly somewhere near and perhaps be home by maghrib or what. but no. :D *skips with glee* that was my first trip to m.b and it was real nice. (: good suggestion i must say which caught me by surprise and happiness. :DDDD we stayed there for some 1.5 hours.

it was seriously a very very calming place. i like that place. and i have Andy to thank for taking me there. (: i can just look at the sea and feel real calm and not think of anything. then we went to battery road to have prayers while i jsut sat by the river staing the the lights and the word "asian civilisation museum" ahhhh. and the wind. ((: nice place nice place! then we walked over to teluk/tanjung gelojoh (HAHAHAHAHA!) to eat. it was damn expensive but okay la not too bad! quite good in fact! (:

thank you. (:

okay. im pretty tired. tell you more about other stuff that's going on when i have the energy to sit and stare at the com. i need to lie down.

goodnight and take care loves!
XOXO.

tmr! thai class dinner! (:

2008-12-14T00:59:00.001+08:00

2008-12-13T21:15:00.003+08:00

my brother is home. (:

welcome back.

no hugs no kisses, whatever la huh.

anyway, im looking forward to another interesting week this week! :D

ikea/dianah/thai class dinner/farah hasinah(i hope soon!)/helping out faz with the seminar a little/zooooo cousins please? (:

that's six activities for a week! close to one day one! (:

and marina barrage, we need to go.

for now, let's keep it real, let's keep it low. (:

i like this one photo from the outing. ((:

2008-12-10T23:26:00.002+08:00

and i had a real good time these two days (:

tooosday was fazzzz day! :D we "hikeddd". walked from my house to adam road. it's very far you know but somehow, neither of us perspired much. how was that possible! :\ had good time spent with her. talking along the way, for 2.5 hrs. real good time. went to queensway and bugis in track pants. ZOHMG. but really, i think we shld have won best dressed. cos cos that's what shopping is about yo, EXERCISE! :D

gotta spend more time with her and the other three lovely crescentians soon!
next week i have more time! (:

wenssssday, today, hort park day! :D with math majors again. ((: it was seriously fun laahhhh. ive never been there, always wanted to go there and never expected to go there with them. toook a gazillion photos definitely. snapp here snap there. from pretty pics to random pics. i dont mind walking again if it's earlier in the morning so that walking can be done by noon. :DD after lunch went to vivocity and played cards. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. cards of all things, believe it. but it was seriously enjoyable. and i suddenly remembered about the monkey bar thingy syaz mentioned. i didnt see no monkey bars. hmm.

buttyflyeees? ;) :) :O :D :S :P

gotta look for present tmr. whaaaaaaaaaaaa to get for that little boy can you suggest to me.
ohnehhhh he bought watch ready cannot buy the watch i wanted to buy for him this yr. ):

and oh. i just realised, i can hold phone ocnverstaions for very very very long with only a few people. hee.

XOXO. take careeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

2008-12-08T21:03:00.002+08:00

b&j chunk fest was a HUGE disappointment. the queue wasnt just queue but queueueueueueueueueuueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueue
ueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueueue.

it was honestly snaking! okay so we didnt bother to queue for ice cream at the fest. but went to cathay for bnj instead. hmm. not surprisingly, everyone felt like having bnj that day. hmm.
so eva and i took maany many photos! and we took more photos on our way to our second sakura meal, that time with man. good company i had that day! :D:D:D:D

it's hari raya todayy. ((: selamat hari raya to all. (:

well im foreseeing that this wwek will be a good healthy week! silat is starting tmr evening, im excited to WALK to island creamery (ironic! but true) from home with my dearest darling, FAZLIAH! she deserves special mentin cos i havent seen her in a long long time. and i've ditched her twice. :\ sorry dearest!

there's also people i havent seen in the longest time and i wanna see them bad.
1. dianah
2. farah
3. farah hasinah
4. FOSB
5. soefieeeeeeeeee!ahh that pretty girl.

well upcoming activites this week are real interesting. gotta get my bro's present soon. ohyea. HE MADE ME FAST FORWARD HIS RETURN. he's coming back on friday. thanks to me. gosh he was basically pestering me! suddenly, i felt so irritated by him. ohwell, my bro will always be my bro.

till then.
<3XOXO<3

i know you dont read this, but you gave me butterflies in my tummy that day. is that good or bad?

2008-12-05T16:10:00.003+08:00

so i stayed home alone last night. it can be therapeutic actually. i kinda like staying home alone. ((: maybe, i'd want to stay at home tonight again. see how things goes when i call my aunt in a bit.

ben&jerry's chunk fest tmr! festing with evaa. ((: wheee ice creaaaaam. i need ice creaaam.

to faz, shall i meet you on tuesday? ((: before my silat?? ((: loveeeee.

ytd, i went out with my cousins too to watch BOLT at causeway point. ((: after which we went to lot 1 wanting to watch another, but there werent any shows at 4plus, so we ended up playing the arcade. FUNNNN. :D
next week, tampines mall and sushi with them! :D

here's sth i'd like to share. ((:
till then, take care all. XOXOXO.

Know that Islam is not prayer alone, nor only a pure heart. No! it is prayer and purity, love and loyalty; it is steadfsatness, good deeds and hospitality; it is pilgrimage and bearing witness; it is alms-giving and worshipping; it is struggle for the cause of Allah and sincere devotion to Him.

Guidance and worship; faith, knowldege and endeavour; wisdom and dignity; paradise and hell; obedience and reverence; a community and an organized society.

Islam, a coherent unit, is indivisible. It is not possible to believe one part of the Book and disbelieve another part. It must be accepted in its entirety. Working to achieve this faith means working at all of it.

"Be quick in the race for your Lord's forgiveness, for a garden whose width is that of all the heavens and the earth is prepared for the righteous: those who give alms, whether in prosperity or in adversity, who restrain anger and pardon their fellow men, because Allah loves those who do good."

-Surah al-'Imran, The Family of 'Imran, 3:133-134

2008-12-04T01:23:00.006+08:00

JB TRIP TODAY WITH NUMBER LOVING KIDS! :D
ahh. there was always a first time for all. took public bus! which was a long long wait at taman uni jusco. hmmm. the bowling. the a&w. the fig&olive. the walking. the factory outlets. and more walking. hmmmm. it was pretty safe going with them la. we got two reliable old guardians with us. who can actually i think take care of us and er me especially. gosh. when am i gonna grow up and be a real lady. HMM. but in any case, it was gooooood. ((: we cannnn gooooo again! and eat sth elseeee! :D

thank you eva, syazana, faris and saliman for the grrrrreat time! :D

one thing for sure, i can be a serious walking disaster. damn. i need to shed off that title. dahlah im a freaking pigeon. HAHAHA. k. private joke. but in any case, i need reformation! :\

and all that confusion, i think staying the way i am now is the best. i have exceprts of convos.

he knows that i know. but i dont want to just know.
but he cant tell you in the face, cos if he does, it'll be left hanging.
but you can tell cos he shows it.
true. cos i dont know my next move. i dont know what i want. im not sure if that's what i want.
he has to be more than "nice" cos "nice" can be found easily in anyone in the future.
ahhh relationships sucks la.

im always the indecisive one. and i dont want to waste anyone's time here. )):
i want to say: i want to find something else in him apart from being just way way nice. so funny makes the cut. comforting makes the cut. "being there for you" makes a little cut today. but, again, im left undecided. i think i need sth more than that. and it'll take time.
damn long time. but time's important. what if i decide not to move. i tell you, i can seriously be a pro heartbreaker. :\ i want to say all these so that he can decide for himself.
but what do i do now.
it'll just affect friendship, my dear friend. especially when we're close. and i dont know if im pretending at the moment to not know. cos i dont pull nor push.
so what do i do now.
it's still early to say i think, i'll let nature take it's course.

gosh, im indecisive and clumsy and gah. i'll stay in my little dandy world for now, tonight.

take care XOXOXO!

AND OH. YOU GUYS CAN DATE ME NOW.
ARRANGE A DATE WITH ME PLEASE! :D

I MISS MY BROTHER. BRO! COME BACK, YOU FOO! :(

2008-11-30T12:59:00.001+08:00

im at my aunt's chilling with a 22-inch screen, wireless keyboard, wireless mouse and super cool booming speakers. cool or what.

and my little pretty alya is behind on the daybed with my cousin chuckling and laughing. i can stay here all day! :D

WHEEE.

2008-11-29T17:23:00.006+08:00

YOU ARE:

LEFT BRAINED

Left brained people tend to be analytical, logical, rational and objective.

Here are some famous left-brainers:
Stephen Hawking
Albert Einstein
Richard Feynman

You have a MALE brain!

The ratio of ring finger length to index finger length is determined by how much testosterone you were exposed to before birth.

Testosterone is primarily a male sex hormone required for the development of male reproductive organs and secondary male sexual characteristics such as facial hair, a deeper voice and more developed muscles.

Your Life Path Number is 7

Your Life Path Number represents the path you should take through life and the talents and skills you have to make your journey a rewarding one.

Having a 7 Life Path makes you a seeker of truth and knowledge. You enjoying exploring the mysteries in life and strive to find answers to the unknown. You are an analytical thinker and enjoy spending time alone with your thoughts. Avoid letting the isolation go to extremes.

Positive Traits

Analytical, Mystical, Prepared, Wise

Negative Traits

Aloof, Cynical, Superficial, Fussy

okay. so er. im analytical and logical and rational and objective. do the middle two hold!? hahahah.

and what male brain. shit, it must have been proven! :\

2008-11-28T13:08:00.003+08:00

COMPUTING SHIT IS OVER! :D

woofoo. now there's only thai left and i have a lot of time to study for it.

so what do i do now. i guess if my mum was around, i'd shout "BU! LETS GO SHOPPPPINGGGG!" the minute i reach home. how? i think i'll be renting vids and stuff to sit home and watch.

hmmm. i wanna go my aunt's place and dance dance revolution! :D
and guitar heroes at cine please, girls? :D

2008-11-27T16:05:00.003+08:00

they've left.
5jan please come soon. )):

take care ibu, ayah.
i'll pray for your safety.
may you have a fufilling haj.
stay safe and healthy.
i love you two.

(insert picture of us here.)

<3 XOXO

2008-11-26T01:42:00.003+08:00

hey ladies. (and couple of gentlemen)

im back. my exams are not over yet. but at least core mods are over

TWO more papers to go and twee im done with sem one and all shit. :D

but that wont come till 2dec. so if you wanna date me, after 2dec okay. HEEE.

in the meantime, the closest event thats gonna come and go real fast(i hope and i pray) is my parents' departure for haj this thursday. ):
i know i know ive been going on about them going for haj and how i'd be lonely, but that's how i really feel. and i just have to say it to prepare myself and not internally breakdown. otherwise, it'll be pretty bad. suppose this'll work to psycho myself out of the thought of missingmy parents damn bad and being lonely.

oh here's something i wanna write on this page for memory's sake.

went out with my mum to town after ages! didnt quite shop. went there to update the students plan thing. but in any case we had sakura buffet with my dad (finally!) after seeing the $47++ price tag to the carousel buffet which we didnt think we're gonna be able to eat $47 worth of food each that night. so we wlaked back all the way to sakura. it was quite a laugh walking with my family along orachrd road. heee.
and my mum said at the dinner table today which made me and bro crack up.
JANGAN NAK KACAU GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND ORANG EHH!
lol! seriously! and another line about my dad's farting, courtesy of my bro.
FEAR NOT THE SOUND, BUT FEAR WHAT COMES NEXT.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

ohwell. probably one of good days together. (:

i love my family to bits and nothing can replace them in the world. (:even though i think i get irritated by my bro easily.

so now can you imagine me sitting in front of the tv alone in the empty house waiting for 5 jan to come. ):
i can tear at that thought already. ):

till then, message me if you are thinking of me. (:
lotsa love, XOXO.

2008-11-15T00:12:00.004+08:00

state: turmoil.

you leave me helpless;
i want it to be but it cant.

if it isn't the way it is;

i'll let it happen.

i don't wanna be the stranger that walks past;
and a catastrophe occurs.

i don't wanna be the cause and effect;

i wanna be It with no burden or clause.

but one thing i know and realise;

i miss you being there for me.

it has to be you, no other you.

i'll tell you in time to come.

happy mugging all. ((:

2008-11-12T18:02:00.002+08:00

been:
1. studying
2. eating
3. gaining weight
4. slacking
5. having lots of laughs
6. smiling
7. angsty
8. hurt
9. lost and confused
10. mugging

will be back soon loves. ( though i was pretty much away for slightly over a month)

till then,
XOXO (that translates to hugs and kisses/kisses and hugs.)

there's so much to laugh and to cry for. please god, let this heart settle.

2008-10-04T23:40:00.002+08:00

this is a photo courtesy of luqman.

though this is slightly late,

SELAMAT HARI RAYA MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN.

sekiranya hakimah sudah melakukan kesilapan terhadap sesiapa sahaja, mahupun hakimah tersalah cakap, tersinggung perasaan sewaktu bergurau senda, termarah, termaki, terkasar bahasa atau lain-lain, secara sengaja atau tidak, hakimah hendak minta maaf banyak banyak, seandainya hakimah hanyalah seorang manusia yang tidak terlepas dari dosa. hakimah berharap apa sahaja ibadah yang telah kita lakukan sepanjang bulan ramadhan yang baru berlalu, diterima oleh yang Maha Esa. Amin.

selain itu, hakimah juga berharap agar dapat bertemu dengan mereka yang sudah lama tidak bersua.

_________________________________________________

finally. i feel awake.

i realise i havent said these. not as a protocol though.

here's whats been happening (:

(1) i had midterms for the whole of this week except monday. needless to say, i screwed all of them up. big time yo. that's it for midterms. it's rly saddening to even think about it now. ):
been studying the week before at central library and home. been doing nothing but study. been reading nothing but notes. been writing nothing but maths. yea. lifes hard yo.

(2) raya.

for the first time in my whole entire life, this year, i cried. i really cried. when i heard the azan yang syahdu, sayu rasanya. it was the last day of ramadhan already. i felt sad that i felt that good and accomplished this year in the month of ramadhan. why didnt i see the beauty and appreciate it all these while. i felt sad i didnt make maximise ramadhan's potential in 2007 when that was the time that should have been of utmost impt. but now im grateful. im loving eery moment of it. i miss ramadhan now. i had such discipline and a lot of time in my hands and less worry. now, everything's back to normal, i cant wait for it to come again next year.

then the takbir. it came like a "pang!". tears started to well up in my eyes. i had to keep looking up to the lights or look down at my food and not look elsewhere just to hide it but my bro had to stare at me all the time. :/ i dont know why, but it felt like it was the last takbir i was gonna hear with my parents. i really really want to hear takbir with my parents again next year and for many years to come. insyaAllah. then flashes of past mistakes i did came back to me. how wrong i was to believe that it was all gonna be alright. my sins came flooding back. i felt a huge burden of sins on my shoulders i wish i could turn back time, but what's done cannot be undone. with that takbir, i want to be a better person. my parents going pilgrimage in nov, i can feel my desire to go mekah already, but it's just not time yet. i just hope i'll live to see kaabah one day.

as for my parents going pilgrimage, that's another story. its a whole new feeling.
_____________________________________________________

first day of raya on wednesday was a total blast! :D i tookayye many many photos at my mum's side. ahh. i like it there. and ate lotsa satay! :D and eclairs and yeaaaa. i was spamming my cousin's new cam (which im going to buy soon) with many many photos. its normal, that's what you get of hakimah when she doesnt charge her cam batt the day before. pictures will say it all! :D

today, i became a...maid/waitress? i was simply serving up drinks over and over, fried more chicken, filled kuih, refill kerepek, hidang lauk-pauk, potong ketupat/lontong, wash plates/cups. yea. cos many many people came over.

in the morning, i went to the florist and bought roses! :D went to the market to get vegetable and other groceries, went to top up petrol, buy ice all by myself! :D and i was a good female driver (for the most part). but really, i could do a three point turn that is only as large as one half lanes! :D

yea. this year, there's lots of jalan raya to do with friends. i wonder if i'll have the time to fix everyone's houses in. but it wont be fun if we dont go for all right, girls?

lots of plans this week! bnj, silat, settlers, more raya and lots of catching up to doooo.

can i have a 48hour day? pretty please with cheesecake and strawberries on the top?

2008-10-04T01:36:00.002+08:00

i actually intended to blog. but im SO SLEEPY now.

i shall go visit my beau: tis lip. in less than min now.

ok its not a skirt.
exams were beyond horrendous. okay.

goodnight..

DEAR DARLINGS ANAK MURID CIKGU RINA. IF YOU DO READ THIS PAGE,
SOMEONE SUGGEST ME A GOOD DATE FOR RAYA? :D

see you al love.

2008-09-29T03:01:00.002+08:00

oh gosh.

i cant quite believe what i just read. but yes, i did read what i read.
not that i freaking care. it doesnt matter. but it came as a shock though it was sort of expected.
ah. let's move on. we all know what was gonna happen in the end didnt we? we just wished that it wouldnt happen. but HAHA. there's nothing to rejoice for.

and so ive been studying like a mad donkey/dog. but farn said dogs dont study. so im a smart dog.

midterms this week!
insyaallah, i'll do okay.
please God, guide me through. bring peace to my heart and mind please.

puasa ending! )):
but happy that i did all the terawih i can every night that i can. :D
tweee.

and dianah, you do know that little shocks brings tears to my eyes. ):
dianaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! you're badly needed! but it's for such a trivial matter.

i havent said these words with much meaning for a long time.
i love you. (what? last year?)
but i mean to say it to my mum and dad on wednesday morning. i love you ibu, ayah.

goodnight all!

and for people who tell me every night to sleep earlier and dont study too hard, i will take care of myself. thanks love. (:

2008-09-24T22:56:00.004+08:00

i went to town (finally! after weeks!) to buy my kasut raya! :D

if it had not been for the company, i would have taken much longer to decide on the shoes cos it is generally the most expensive girl shoes i ever bought and also the highest pair of heels i would have, if i bought it.

and so i bought it! :D

and it matches almost every colour baju kurung i have in my wardrobe! :D yay.

pretty right. :D except that my feet ugly. :/

okay back to studying. goodbye lovettes.

and shit, i missed iftar seehhhh cos ayah tak kasiiii. ape sehhhh! )):

2008-09-22T21:32:00.003+08:00

okay okay okay!

im back and i know some people are missing me! :D HAHAHA.

shut up already, hakimah.

okay so here's the deal.

i'll study like a donkey this week. period.

i had a sad sad weekend, having to go geylang on both saturday and sunday. it was very uhc an eyesore. and i finally bought first day raya baju kurung which is GREEN! :D jengjengjeng, i feel like a raintree. silat, was fun as always. though it was painful on the thigh muscles and joints. then i had 6 people crammed at the back, with zuraimi in the front passenger seat. (:

the pitiful 6 people were: amirah, kamielah, nasuha, sharifah, naim and chong. lol! i'll get a bigger car next time. ;) they were squashed i think, and we got lost somehow cos we made a wrong left turn. hahaha. it doesnt matter. we were all safe. (:

my deal is still on.

i hanged out at farah's studio on friday afternoon, from 215 till 515. woah. and her friends are funny people. we talked and talked and talked and talked. woah i feel better talking about it though i think i wasnt supposed to say it to anyone at all. HAH.

but anyway, whatever i said to her, i think those were final. im not feeling all that weird-ism anymore. i feel relaxed now that im back on track. so dear farah hasinah, i need to tell you something.

to faz, breathe easy girl. (:

went to school today to study. i thought it went pretty well for me cos i managed to get done whatever i wanted to do plus got started on linear algebra and i need serious help with that. but hakim had an unproductive day, or so he said. HMMM. luqman gave me nano nano sweets! :D heeheeeheee. i miss that. eh look for the melody thing soon eh! and i forgot to ask fatin to miss call me. :/

tmr will be a study group day: initiative of farhan (whom i have a slight impression of alr) and then remedial. WHAT UNI STUDENT HAS REMEDIAL SEH! ):

okay till then, when i have time to blog again, i wonder when, take care darls. (:

p/s. project AVOID;

2008-09-18T23:10:00.003+08:00

well, it's been long.

one day at a time.

you dont have to figure out why.
you just know it.

but what happens when you dont know what's going on?

stress, leave it.

why take it so hard?

she finally knows who you are.

she is letting it go.

but dont you think it was almost impossible to say so.

why, we just need to pull through.

thank you for being my friend. (:

i spent hours studying lately! and ifnally i can relax on a thursday night! :D im gonna have to try to learn how to use that photoshop. hmmm. and and and. im missing hearts.

baked brownies for farah's birthday! :D i really really hope it's nice. teeheeeee! i owe ayu brownies too! oops! sorry! and there was one revelation that left me disgusted. whenever i think about it, i get jitters. there's another revelation, and i somewhat feel happy about it now. :D honestly, really.

i sleep tonight, in peace. (:

2008-09-09T21:26:00.002+08:00

ahhh. im anticipating to type many many words tonight. (:

okay. so.

the weekend has passed. i slept a lot. enough to put me back to full battery. but somehow, my batteries are diminishing at an incredible speed.

it has been schoolwork these days. ):

since i end at 12 today, i rushed home to slack. i intended to sleep really, but i didnt cos i got stuck at the com playing games and reading stuff and watching vids. HAHA. then after zohor, i started my homework.

i managed to finish my calculus tutorial! :D and not forgetting fundamentals too! :D but i fell asleep trying to prove qn 7 of fundamentals. i even dreamt i found the answer but when i woke up, i realised my dream was a proof to a different qn which was already proven. the more i think, the more i fell asleep and i slept till 6. at the study table. HAHA.
nurul nurul, tidur atas katil tak nak!

tonight, im gonna do computing. hmmm. i still have a lot to revise! so i shall do that later too. otherwise there'll be tmr afternoon. (:

my brother had a war with all his artwork in the hall. psst. his theme is war!
i remember i used to do the same to the whole living room floor or dining table or room floor to do my homework and revision and it'll look like a warzone.

love yall lovettes!

2008-09-04T21:18:00.002+08:00

before i start my study bonanza proper.

this is totally un-fun anymore. ): and i really dont like it. i want to live and breathe and have hiccups in peace, yo.

i fell asleep watching fundamentals webcast at home the night before. im gonna watch it again and please hakimah, stay awake.

im finally catching up in school though i have additional self exercises to do. will do this weekend if i dont go out.

just when i feel rejuvenated, something just has to pull me down a little.
but my darlings will know i'll definitely pick up in no time.

okay faz, your bag how! and i need pants! dianah, i want to spend some quality time with you! farah hidayati, you've been missing in school! ): mojojojo, after fasting k! and all of you, i need a beeeeeg hug! ):

ohyea. today was amazingly alive day. syazana fell asleep a little in both calculus and linear algebra but it's a GREAT IMPROVEMENT! well, she still owes me clodhoppers and stuff! LOL! eh, syazana, paper and pens are great tools to keep us awake. and and i dont abuse you sehhhh! haha. seeeee you tmr! :D and im serious about what i told you online. and sakura please! :D

goodbye lovettes.

2008-09-02T00:39:00.002+08:00

SELAMAT BERPUASA SEMUA!

okay. there has been so many things going on lately that i seriously have no time for myself like sitting down and just look at the sky to admire god's creations.

1. fasting month is here and im seriously looking forward to a very good one. the previous one had been pretty much atrocious and i am not keen at all to share why. ):

2. ups and downs and ins and outs of little sweet admirations.

3. went to the RSAF open house on sunday and ohmygorgeousdelights! the planes were simply amazing. the materials used are really like weight, they are like really light, i was stroking, okay touching, the body of the plane it was quite flimsy yet sturdy. how to say? hmmm. some light metal. that's why it is able to take flight! and if you look into the mechanism and all those switches and pipes, woah, that really awed me. i took photos! but i guess i'll share them when i have more time to transfer the photos. now, no time.
but in any case, we didnt get to watch the aerial display cos it was at 5 and we missed the 1030 show and it'll be too late to wait for 5pm. so my brother and i left and took a shuttle to eunos from where my parents fetch us home! :D nevertheless, i love planes even more now! :D

4. school.
what about school! there's so many things about school that i'll limit this portion to studies. hmm.
i really think im gonna be a mama panda by the end of this sem. calculus is draining, linear algebra is at the time being easy but tedious; and to think he said it's gonna get harder (crap). then there's fundamentals. which is seriously common sense, but they make it uncommon yknow.

ive been staying up till late these past few days tyring to do tut after tut after tut which are never ending. havent even finish one tut, another has been posted up! we aint no robots yo. and ive yet to do textbook exercises and read through for the fifth time fundamental notes from lect 1-6! holy. seriously, it's so easy to grasp and yet so easy to forget.

and i finally know the bus schedule! :D
i leave home at 6.55am to walk like the contrapositive of a turtle/snail and catch the 6.59am bus or later. then i'll reach school bus stop around 7.40, walk in 10 min and tada! i'm on time for lect/tut. but 963 comes in pairs in the morning! so better catch either one! :D
leaving school on a late day. i better catch that 5.40pm bus or it'll be sardines when the next bus comes.

hurray to hakimah.

see you around lovettes!

and my new friends are coooooooo!

2008-08-28T21:42:00.002+08:00

eh? why must sign in again? weird.

von's leaving tonight. like in 1.5 hours exactly. goodbye von, may you have a fulfilling freshman year in ohio. see you next summer. (:

anyway, today had been a ________ day. it took a turn in a matter of seconds.

but girls. hope can bring about disappointment. so how now brown cow?
):

im gonna buy ritter sport for my mum tmr at the arts forum. but definitely no coli. unlike dannyla who bought them! lol! in the middle of arts forum! LOL!

aiya. i really shouldnt care. see, im entitled to my own opinion right?

someone please say yes!

remember that song one last time: best i ever had - vertical horizon.
goodbye.

2008-08-27T15:57:00.002+08:00

here i am on a wednesday afternoon.

i know, im a frequent updater nowadays, cos like im always in front of the com and somehow my day would always either be HAPPY or sucky. ): so choose one for me everyday.

i talked to FAZ last night till about 3! :D like suddenly so nice to talk to her again. heh. and i HOPE we can meeeet sooooon! (: tweee.

FAZ! bulan puasa akan bermula minggu hadapan, saya berasa tidak sabar untuk menyambutnya dengan penuh kegembiraan dan kesyukuran. faz, faz, kita harus berbuka puasa bersama-sama suatu hari nanti ye! dan jangan lupa untuk berhari raya bersama-sama walaupun kita semua begitu sibuk dengan sekolah masing-masing ok? (:

well, lets start with today. i woke up on time and all but my mum decided to send me to school so she did and i was late for calculus lab. i asked hafiz(as i reckon from the name list) how to do the shit but apparently (or not), he didnt know how. so thanks zarifah for saving me! lol! we go for lab session soon k, zarifah! and get that maple thing done! i had diarrhoea in the morning(cos i think i didnt eat at all last night eventhough i thought i wanted to eat the porridge or maggi when i came home). and i had to make a mad dash to arts fac at 9.57am. luckily for me, i managed to reach at 10.07am and it hasnt started! woofoo!

thai class is still rocking awesome! ((: teach you more thai when i finish my homework.

wanted to go ishop tdy, but nobody to go with and it was RAINING. so i headed home and slacked up till now. shld start work soon. so probably going with syazana on sat after silat or summat. (:

but before i go. silat was stress reliever. amidst all that harangue barangue of tutorials dont understand and not done. and i had cramps in my leg while i was kicking what running what all that. pain shit sia. luckily i didnt fall down cos i really had no control over my leg. it just stiffened. heh. i think cos i had high sugar level in my body since i had a can of ice lemon tea right before training. i don tknow what caused it, but somehow i dont think it's cos i didnt stretch enough. hmmm. and so the story goes and stuff.

i told faz about it. teehee! i managed to cut the whole story short. sighhh. well many things happened la huh. well i don think faz's feelings and deductions will come through/true, yet, hmmmmm. just see! :D

okay! homework time now!

psst. my mum knows sia!

2008-08-26T00:10:00.002+08:00

tutorials have begun!

1.dr ng remembered my name in TEN minutes. shoot the ferrari. he said he was gonna take about 2-3weeks to remember our names.

2.thai class was rocking awesome! :D
sawaddi ka, dichan chee hakimah ka. khun chee arai ka? [translation: hellO! my name is hakimah. what is your name?]
khun chee nanaa ka. [translation: her name is nana]
dii may (mai)? may dii! [translation: is this good? yes it's good!]
khaw ?uan may? may ?uan! [translation: is she/he fat? yes, she/he is fat] HAHA!

it was basically intonation day today. it was pretty funny but fun. it's like a singing class and it's quite hard for people like me who has an airy voice (faz and farah confirmed it)
nevertheless, looking forward to next thai class! :D

3.ate at macs tdy since eva was an central forum studying and syazana and i was at arts for tutorials, so we went to eat macs. it was my first trip there and fuyoo! cheap siaaa! :D i mean cheaper than usual price outside. haha. it was pretty packed considering it was lunch time. heh. after which we went for lecture. and both syazana and i fell asleep in calculus. HAHA. we're pretty useless aint we! hahahahhahhaha.

eh syazana! stop sleeping la! hahaha. we shld have a robot that pokes us out of our sleep. tsk tsk tsk. see you tmr yaaa.

uhhuh. i think that's it. tmr is a super short day. and im looking forward to it. can go and find laptop case at ishop. :D to bring laptop or not to bring. HMMM.

lunching with farah hidayati tmr! it'll be my treat. HAHAHAH.

goodbye lovettes.

message to fazliah: why do i feel so detached from you! man. fazzzzzzzzzzzz, come to nus! )))):

2008-08-24T00:15:00.004+08:00

i know it's a super late post. but i have had a good day today which makes me want to blog. haha.

okay. so i slacked and did not touch any notes, as expected. i will do more tuts tmr. i promise.

went for silat training. i was EARLY! there was only like 8 of us. more came around 11.15 yea. but imagine if i had to take the bus. i'll be there only at 1130. today was agility training. woah. FUN! :D long since i actually had agility training so going back to it was seriously big time fun. HAHA. when did i last do that? in crescent? during mr samat days? i dont even remember. but dance had SOMETHING like that la huh. just less tiring and all. but it felt so refreshing to do it. like lotsa jumps and all. cool! did stuff called pasang, or so i think. pretty interesting, though i really think i look like a waddling duck. after that went to vivo for lunch. ahhh laksa! :D

went to meet farah t watch fireworks! and she asked this indian parttime nus student to join us. okay. cool! new friend! :D the fireworks were pretty yo! it only started at 915. and lasted till about 945 i think. then it was jammed and poor farah hasnt eaten yet so we went to eat bk after saying gdbye to anil (the indian guy who earns $7+K at credit suisse) dammit. yea. we chatted over her dinner. OHCRAP! I FORGOT TO PAY HER! (i'll pay you when i see you in schl, or i'll treat you to technoeedge or megabites or sth :D)and we left after syafiq called farah. yea. so she had a friend to chat with on the train ride home. so sorry! but i can take bus back, see. faster. ((:

so that was my day.

eva,ayu,farah hasinah, farah hidayati and syazana! teehee! chatted today. found out my birthdate all. hahahah! :D tell you more tell you more. TEEHEE!-ing.

i am in a state of euphoria. :D

2008-08-23T00:23:00.003+08:00

HELLLO! (with overwhelming enthusiasm and excitement)

i think my blog looks nice now. not so orange-y.

anyway.

FINALLY! i finished linear algebra tut 1: which took ages to do cos i havent exactly revised so i kept flipping through to look for help. and i guess i did learn somethings. and finish doesnt necessarily mean that i could do all. i left 4 blanks. help, someone?

tdy, i felt like a hardworking, studious girl. i went to central library to study from 12-3pm. i got restless really but i HAD to do my tuts. so i managed to finish half of FM tut and 4/5 of computing. cos i need to check the processor speeds. damn there's still calc to check through and tut 1 all by tuesday! shit. i dont think i'll be sleeping on monday. ):

met farah hidayati at her studio and made a new friend: CINDY! :D she's a dancer with synergy. coolzz.

and left schl. and i cant help noticing how inconsiderate some people are, talking on the phone in the reading area. )): not that i care, but there was the chat point! and it was pretty warm.

highlight for the schl week: mission on thursday with farah hasinah!

it was green you know? the shade i like yknow yknow? my mission was completed within 45 min since it began and farah's mission was completed at the last minute. lol. we were two more-than-happy kids. ((: grinning from ear to ear. :D hahaha. and i have farah to thank for the book yea! :D next mission will be next week i hope. :D and sorry to danielah! TEEHEE!

tdy wasnt mission day, really. but i also have hazirah to thank for the suggestion. :D which left me all smiles! haha. those girls. tsk tsk tsk. according to them, i was wearing a telekong. HAHA! please. i have another telekong skirt at home yet to be worn to schl. now that's real telekong.

TEEHEE! :D

psst. syazana says we look A BIT like each other. hmmmm... (pauses to think)

TUTORIALS STARTS NEXT WEEK! MADRUSHMADRUSH.

wtf?! i have a hindustan song in my wmp!

2008-08-22T19:44:00.002+08:00

skin up! :D
i can alter skins now, but just not MAKE my own skins. ((:

twee. will blog another time.

TEEHEE! :D (psst even faz agrees!)

2008-08-20T23:21:00.002+08:00

i need to start studying big time.
tutorials are just next week, i havent started doing any. shit.

i hope tmr will start the ball rolling for the study-holic to come back. gonna study with ayu and eva.at...im not so sure where. shall jsut follow. i hope sharifah can come too later. (:

to von, i'll come visit you before you leave. this tuesday should if can.
to faz, i miss you. i want to spend some time with you and feel enlightened and refreshed.
to dianah, i hope schl goes well for you this sem. rmb tues,weds and fridays! :D
to farah, our lunch!
to ama, i finally know why you like silat so much. i like it too. :D
to jocelyn, BABE! I HAVENT SEEEN YOU FOR AGES. im still here waiting to hear your story you're supposed to tell and my story.

talking about silat. on tuesday, training was pretty much just recap and i no longer had aching legs. i seriously think it was the wedge i wore for the wedding. blasted thing, i threw it away already. yea.
and shakes eyebrows, ayu, you know. HAHAHA. after training, went for dinner. i htink i was so hungry, by the time i sat down, i dont feel hungry anymore. HAHA. ohwell. expected of nurul, see.

before faz (and me too) gets eye sore reading this post, i shall stop.
time to hurtle full speed!

i shall change skin soon. when i can find the time.

alright. assalamualaikum semua.

2008-08-18T10:34:00.002+08:00

yesterday was the end of a hectic weekend.
finally i can settle down and concentrate on school and start studying.

on friday, i had lunchwith nur eva and mas ayu at megabites. after which, i went home and started working on the wedding like a superf16. i printed out my artworkadn went searching for a cardboard box all over the place; downstairs, all rubbish dumps, the rubbish collection centre, and esso. drove to sheng siong to buy 4kg of icing sugar and maggi. came home, iced the cupcakes with soft icing, and then let it to dry. cut up the cardboard box. packed the cupcakes, and stuff and the list of activities goes on.

on saturday, morning was already a rush. iron my baju kurung, only to realise i didnt bring it to silat to change into it and leave for the wedding immediately. shit. ): then went off for silat and i bindly wore a slipper that doesnt match and to drive. and that slipper is damn slippery so my feet keep on slipping out of the slipper. sent my aunt home first then got onto aye to get to school. i almost got lost cos i didnt know which exit i had to exit to. but all was well. reached, it hasnt started (luckily) then we started warmups. which was the bomb. honestly. literally and metaphorically. but it wsa so good to stretch like that again after the last dance session earlier on this yr. :D i just love warmups. i feel so relaxed after that and felt so gooooooood. :D :D so we started silat. we had to do like a kuda-kuda. like for dance. but it's so long since i did them, my legs were atrociously aching. i had to leave earlier at one. in my rush of getting home by 120 to have time to bathe and change, i forgot to do cool downs. and now, im aching 360degrees. shit. and there's training tmr, i dont know how to recover by tmr. im really aching everywhere. my front and back thighs, front and back calf, and shoulders. that's really everywhere cos they are joints and limbs. ):

rushed to toapayoh to go with the rombongan. then reached tampines next to tp for the akad nikah.
the deco were gorgeous! :D
and the food was delicious! :D
the wedding cake, was so grand! i love it!
so we came back. came home and started doing up the signboards. cutting pasting, and more cutting cos my dad said it's better to use a whole board than half of the drawing block size. but luckily for me, he cut up the super bigboard for me. i wanted to wrap the signboard but there wasnt enough plastic to wrap! damnit. my mum assured me that it wouldnt rain on sunday. (take note of this) then helped with more face stuff for the wedding cake. i got so tired i went up and used the com to relax. HAHAH.

on sunday. left home pretty early. after ironing my baju kurung (again!) to wear for the day. started the day by putting up the freaking signboards. it was effing hot. i successfully drench my spag inside. luckily i wore that spag otherwise my songket will be drenched as well. during the majlis, i was supposed to do kendarat. but there wasnt much things to do. suddenly, heavy rain poured. DAMN! my signboards, i dont wanna know what happened to it. but managed to save one. then dont know how, i follwed the rombongan to tampines again to the girl's side. stayed there a while to eat and bergambar. came back and all and continued with kendarat thing. 10 minutes later, my aunt asked me to take photos. SHE BOUGHT A DSLR! OMG. so cool. i ended up playing with it my whole time. take photos of the cake la, the pelamin la. random shots la. the whole thing la. many many. i was so pleased with my batch of shots that day. HAHAHAH. :D i left for home at 430, took cab with my bro. i had class dinner that night.

class dinner. I SAW PIN AGAIN! :D it was really joyous to see people you spent two yrs with again. jeff looks smart and cool in the uniform. :D aliff looks like he gained weight. ahhaha. i was sitting with them cos i came late. pin looks sooooooooooooooooooooooo pretty! :D ahhhhhhhh. meiyi looks really good too! nette, i havent seen her in school or anywhere! ): meixia, our future doctor as well, still looks cute as ever. (: haaaaaaa. jiayi looks nice. and shufen and eileen still the same. jean and lauren also the same. wongyongxian, no need to saw. ohyes. ANDREW LOOKS SO MUCH BETTER. hahahahha. mingsheng, i saw him the other day in school, no diff. then aly and germaine, i like germaine's permed hair. though it was so long ago. hahahahah yea. ling, ah im going to miss her when she leaves. ):

thats it for the night. i think. i came home feeling happy and refreshed though still tired and aching.

im fasting today. leaving for school at 1pm. (: twee.
assalamualaikum semua!

woah what a long post.

i miss my girlfriends. ):

2008-08-13T08:10:00.003+08:00

ahh! HELLO!

its been a very long time since i blogged. now i finally found the time and mood. :D

okay. so much has happened. okay. basically im in the process of immersing myself into school. and thats a good sign; at least im not so ut of touch with school and im making new freidn each day like asking their name, what do they do and which school they're from. that's a good start. :D hooray to hakimah.

on saturday, i went to watch fireworks with my little cousins. yea. it was fun though with kids but really cute la. and the fireworks, needless t say, were gorgeous. ((:

on sunday, what did i do? let me see. AH. went to a jemputan. eh no, that was saturday. oh went tahlil and then to causeway point and stayed home for the rest of the day. yea. nothing much i guess.

MONDAY! my frst school day in NUS! :D began classes at 2. i was just in time. bought calculus text which was heavy shit and linear algebra notes book. yup. and calculus was nice. linear algebra was interesting though i got REALLY tired. ): i yawned countless times. so yea. it was a back t back lecture, so it explains. and on thurdsday, im gonna have the same 2-6 lecture. haha. and gosh, what was i thinking. it'll just make mybutt expand.

tuesday. tadadada! it was a very empty day i guess. had fundamentals at 8. i reached just in time. maybe i should try taking the morning bus instead. it took me 1 hr 15 min to reach school by taking the train then bus. gah. ): then at 10 slacked around and chilled with syazana (a math major too! :D) went t the science library and just sit there yea. theni went home taking 963 whihc took ONLY 25 minutes! :D woohoo. good transport system. in the afternoon ayu (another new found friend but she's so funny and very easy t get along with, a chem major) called and met up with her at lot 1. after which we went to silat welcome tea. (: ahhh. here's where the day kinda end on a high note for me.

silat. can you just imagine me doing silat at all? no? i guessed just as much. neither do i. but seriously. silat. i didnt know i had that much strength in me and all along i thought i was the lembut shit, carry 20 kg like want t die like that and when people push me i will fling all the way back king of thing? yea. but i did not! i had so much fun trying out some moves and it was honestly perspire inducing. WOO! what a great time-to-lose-weight programme! :D maybe thi s is my shot to prevent myself from being a larger elephantess. (:

that's all i think. school is at 12. leaving home around 11.15 (:

for now, im sending my love to all.
assalamualaikum semua!

2008-08-06T11:11:00.002+08:00

so school is starting next week.
i have 3 more fireworks days to enjoy. yeap.

anyway, there's so many things i want to do and accomplish, but i just have no time or resources or just worried that i wont have enough time which has thus made me not do anythign about it.

1. i wanna DANCE. like attend classes since i cant join dance in nus. there's ballet i wanna do and of course hip hop and jazz.

2. i wanna FLY. like join the Singapore Flying Club and FLY a plane. i saw the aviation course at TP that my brother intends to take up and they require 10 points for olevels. if i dont get to fly, i want my brother to. at least, there's a future pilot in the family.

3. i wanna be part of a movement. i want to make a difference. everyone was born to make a difference. it's just a matter of the effort you put in. and really, i wanna do something for a good cause. of course, it'll be great if it's children-related.

lastly, i still want to be that paediatric. that has always been my dream. let me have that will to persevere through math major and go overseas after that. time to search for possible unis in australia! :D

no songs in my mind now to share!

2008-08-03T23:15:00.003+08:00

ahhhh. here's my brand new post.

i went t watch NDP PREVIEW! teh cooolz. i love the black knights man. they really make my heart skip a beat. and of course the red lions! not to mention the fireworks! <3
i love anything to do with the great, vast never ending sky. and i love stuff that are high up in the air and things that fly. except for birds but when birds fly, they amaze me. i've always wanted to fly. i want to fly aeroplanes. big/small, i dont care. but not those remote controlled planes please. but the combat planes, they just have that swift factor and they are damn sexy. and they COMBAT(when used for combat). i really like it. the pilots are definitely my idols. they have confidence and are risktakers. they even have GRRRRRREAT discipline and teamwork. this is what people should be. you have to have that confidence even when you think you're going to fail: so have confidence to fail as well. it helps yknow.

then azam came down to my seat. amazingly, he found me! HAHA. in all that mass white caps everywhere and i was wearing a white tudung. HAHAHA. you did a great job azam! LOL. and so i intro-ed him to my mum. blabla. yea. and so we said goodbye. i wasnt quite paying as much attention to him while talking cos he found me a little wrong time as the statues were very very innovative, i just HAD to look at them. i was wondering how they managed to elevate the thing and look like some marbled pillar. turns out i missed the elevating part cos i turned back. HAHA. and the marbled pillars were just A LOT OF CLOTH. cool stuff. ((: makes me want to participate in the ndp. i've always loved performing too. (:

____________________________________

i've got to make new friends at NUS. really. soon. better be. cos like right now, ive got that lack of network in nus since i didnt attend any camps so i cant quite get the info i want. like what time do i have to report for flag day on tuesday, like when the hell is the inaug thing!? i dont know shit really. oh wells.

____________________________________

ive been talking to weehoe a lot lately! hahahaha. of all random stuff yea. and i told him i like jazz singers (WTF?!) just cos that nathan hartono sang at the parade. LOL. eh but his voice damn good eh!

____________________________________

took lotsa photos with farah hidayati. ((: when she came by my place to do the shit bidding. :D her witch yoo hee is still with me though! hahaha.
and talking about bidding, i cant emphasise more how i hate this whole bidding idea. sigh. disliking school already when it hasnt even started! )):

____________________________________

THAT IS IT!

FIREWORKS DISPLAY ON 22 AND 23 AUG. VOLUNTEER OR JUST WATCH?

-loves!

2008-08-01T01:20:00.002+08:00

this has got to be one of those last few posts before i start my new life in nus.

-takes deep breath.

there are some things which i like to change about myself. after talking and much small occurences in these past few days, it has dawned on me, my flaws are serious flaws.

1. i should be more decisive. what the hell, no.
I WILL BE DECISIVE.

can you imagine.
just how many people i asked whether to choose a lenovo or a fujitsu laptop?
Just how long i talked over the phone with FOSB t discuss and then convince me to choose one of them?
just how many dreams i had dreaming about which laptop was good - that i even dreamt myself being at the fujitsu service centre twice?
jsut how mnay times i flipped over the two brochures again and again to see which appeals me?
just how many coins or random stuff i chose and then let FOSB t choose. from coins to shoes or bags to mrt or lrt. WTF?!

it's that bad, honestly. eventually, i went up to the two booths at school tdy (technically ytd) to try carrying the laptop. and so fujitsu wins.

2. i will not be hypocritical and less bitchy if not bitchy at all.

i didnt think it was THAT bad, maybe it isnt but it's getting more and more apparent. i should really stop being a bitch. i will change that about myself. those are really sinful (literally). tell me why tell me why im like this. I WILL CHANGE.

and from that point, i fell asleep. HAHA. cos i rested my head on the pillow.
so here my post continues. NEXT!

2008-07-26T00:39:00.003+08:00

i am standing as i type this post.
i've been sitting on that annoying black chair far too long. since 8.30? oh god. at this rate my butt/hip/thigh size is going to triple in 2 weeks. no joke. i'm now an elephantess at 55kg. that's 5kg more than i used to be only 2 months ago. please, you're allowed to say: STOP EATING LAH!

ok. here's what been happening to me.

on....wednesday, i went out with fazzzzz and dianah. eeee so long neh see her already, i miss her truckloads. we ate at breeks i ate the mashed potato and shared some creamy pasta with faz. (thus it is no wonder im gaining weight like an elephantess) then we walked to mind cafe. on the way there we window shopped a little. then we came to the erp gantry. HAHAHA. (read dianah's blog for what happened) then we walked further and started playing games like quelf and express it and taboo and another game. it was pretty fun but i think would be more enjoyable with another person. ((: yea. after which we left at 5.30 and we took jumping photos along prinsep st in front of an office. HAHAHAHA. so random and so out in the open but cool esp with faz's phone! :D yea.

thursday, i went somewhere in the morning. OH YA. cjc to help out with racial harmonay. it was standard. but i think last yr more hyped up. ((: yea. the satay has always been good, thanks to the boys fanning the fire all the time. woohoo future orang jual satay! then movie. IT WAS DAMN COOL yes.

announcement for everyone: WATCH DARK KNIGHT. MUST EVEN IFYOU HAD NO PRIOR INTENTIONS, JUST WATCH.

headed to meet mum at taka and we went to peninsula and kg jawa. help bro look for stuff. yea.

finally, TDY.
was a horrible start. i was late for the briefing by half an hour. it was all very confusing butim getting a hang of it now after sitting since afternoon at 4 and started checking out the CORS website. and i hate it now. i hate this bidding idea. damn. it's just so hard to arrange my own timetable. sigh. and this is one big reason why my butt is going to expand. )):

my eyebags are enlarged. ):

2008-07-24T00:25:00.002+08:00

i should really be sleeping now cos i have to wake up early.

why do people wear make up? to beautify themselves and look presentable.

i dont know. maybe i'll wear make up wheni go out in the future and maybe i wont. i dont know myself. but there's like thousands of floors of make up cosmetic department in the world combined to cater for both men and women. are they really necessary? definitely yes for models i suppose. but have you ever really wondered why people will put on at least foundation and lipstick whenever they have some important people to meet? again the word presentable and inviting(?) yeah. i guess - i dont know - a lot of girls just put on make up without thinking of the purpose for doing so.

but they CAN be presentable without it. make up can really change your look from sexy to sweet to sultry to just plain emo. i see tons of girls walking down orchard road donning 10 inches thick of make up. whyyyyyyyy. whywhywhy. would guys be attracted but it is such a shame that you have to don another face to others when you're out and when you're at home, you'll be at your most natural. natural beauty. isnt that much better? it's god's gift no matter how you look. appreciate it. that links to another topic of cosmetic surgery. but i'm too lazy to talk about that.

and so there was my rants of some thoughts being put together but doesnt seem to flow.

will chat about our cute cute trip to the mind cafe tmr along with cjc racial harmonay happening at 8 am later!

see ya girls.

2008-07-22T23:38:00.002+08:00

hey.

how are you all feeling this fine tuesday night? im feeling really thirsty.

anyway. there are a few reasons as to why i havent blogged for a week. many things happened which i dont wish to talk about cos they only form bad memories and it's better if i just leave it at that and forget about it. but there are of course some things worth remembering.

where do i start.

I L-O-V-E CHILLING.
and i'm going to chill a lot in this two weeks.
i bet you on that.
so who's up for some chilling with me? we can try making our own cocktails and spaghetti? MMMMM.

ive been spending a lot of my days with farah lately! :D like i see her almost every alternate day and i appreciate her company, especially during the dumb shit medical checkup at UHWC which took me about 4 hours to complete. ZOMG. without her there, i think - i dont think- I'M DAMN SURE i'll be bored to death or just glue myself to my phone trying to call people who'd entertain me. HAHA!
ahh and on the first alterate day she came, we cooked SPAGHETTI! :D it was damn good for people like us! :D ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. do you want to try our spaghetti? XD and we camwhored. something i only do with these close girls.
i went to watch firework with her too on saturday! IT WAS SO PRETTY! i want to catch the rest too! someone else come with me? FAZZZZZZ has that ntums camp to go. ):

kiayi is here with his wife and staying at my place for......i really dont know how long. and for every night he's been here, there has been visiotrs non-stop. it's like hari raya. but i just lock myself up in this room and ignore all else. im such a good daughter. (what say you?)

I'VE BEEN SPENDING A HECK LOT AND I FEEL DAMN GUILTY. I SHOULD STOP SPENDING MONEY LIKE WATER AS THOUGH I PRINT WADS OF MONEY. DAMN.

i really didnt want to use the credit so much but like all the stuff i bought - which i cant remember what - requires a suitcase of money, like my one yr supply of contacts which cost my dad $364 and 4 tank tops from topshop which cost my dad another $60. woah. and i am sure i bought more stuff. and i even need more jeans/pants cos i gained weight - FORK AND SPOON! GAH! - and there's still the laptop i need. those are going to cost a lot. damn. im biting my nails waiting for the credit card bill to come. i have never spent so much before and i have never eaten like an elephant before. my appetite is growing bigger and bigger by the mealtime. it's no wonder im gaining weight.

i really need to get to school fast so i can immerse myself in education and get stressed about not having done my homework or stress about shit that i dont understand and think: holy. am i stupid or what. SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME! that kind of stuff. then i can divert my attention to those and forget about food and stop gorging and craving for stuff like daily-fix-of-chocolate. talking about daily-fix-of-chocolate: that requires money too and more calories (not that i count them). ):

siala, teriyaki chicken stew la. ):

oh faz told me that singaporeean girls are part of the TOP 10 SEXIEST/HOTTEST GIRLS IN THE WORLD. what the bangla?!

2008-07-15T00:59:00.002+08:00

heyheyhey! (tune: the milk song of some advertisement shit) or was it "ho ho ho"?

there's so many things to say and i think it's gonna be long post.
here goes.

ONE.
my mum's birthday! :D 14 july.
she's way way cool to be so young and im only 19. :D it was mostly like any other day but with a lot more love in the house :D (somehow i could tell) i cooked with her and helped clean the stove, something which i only do when she's sick/tied up with many things/birthday. so basically cleaning stove is like a special act that deserves to be applauded. it was a dirty, oily stove. so yea. then there was some confusion to her birthday cake thing but eventually it all went well. ice cream! :D at swensens. like always. but eating at swensens wasnt actually special, but it's special today cos it's a monday. we dont eat swensens on mondays. weekends only. THE BEST PART: WE SCREAMED OUT HAPPY BIRTHDAY SONG IN THE LIFT TWICE, once on the way, once on the way home. it was deafening. i swear my ear drums could split. but it was so funnyyy. she had a memorable expression. HAHA.

declaration: I LOVE YOU, IBU! :D god bless you. (and all the other prayers to god that i've made.)

TWO.
no school today. 15 july.
ahh. i woke at up 6.37am, thinking, oh no, im not going to school. ): feeling really upset about that, that i decided to close my eyes and release that morning blues and feel happy about it, but it put me back to sleep which made me miss my prayer. damn. at every period which i have lesson, i wonder what they were doing. but it made me feel happy to know they are in undeniably better hands compared to me. they're gonna improve, i hope. shite, can you just imagine how horrible i was a MALAY teacher. ~~oh man, dont even bother, you'll vomit blood.~~
but im so missing them. as was my previous post. but i'll get over it.
nooks, i can still picture your face. but it'll be blurry in no time, no doubt.

like the song, refer below.

THREE.
oh no, i havent called faz for two days though i promised her i'd call like a few hours later, but i'm so caught up ): i feel bad about that. like i was cooking, then i went for ice cream dinner afterwhich i forgot to call her back until i was bathing but it's already so late. i believe faz should get more sleep this period, ok? i'll call her tmr. I PROMISE. and this one wont be broken.

FOUR.
CAR-nival. 13 july.
it was packed at expo hall 4. but i wonder just how people can buy a car immediately without testdriving it. and the proton cars are so mechanical (keras) that it doesnt suit me. so please dad, i dont want the proton. after being so used sitting in cars that are big and spacious like merc, bm and though-quite-small jag, and the hyundai sonata, sitting in small hatchbacks and smaller cars made me have a little phobia of enclosed spaces, especially in cars. i dont know, sitting at the driver's seat is fine, but i worry the passengers wont be comfortable enough to sit more that one hour inside. but in any case, having a small car is perfect for me and my mum. ((:
dad, it doesnt matter what second car you get, it's your money anyway and it's all for the mode of transportation. i'm already a lucky girl to have all this luxuries. thanks be to god for bestowing us with such rezeki.

FIVE.
the guy who asked for my number in the library, i'm sorry it's just not your day and please, if you dont have any place better to ask for girls' numbers, do it like more subtle-ly (if you're asking in the lib) or just go get someplace else. NOT THE LIBRARY. how uncool is that.
that experience was totally disgusting. well i cant deny, im superficial to a small extent - ok certain extent- he just wasnt my type. like please. i dont look freaking 24 who's desperate and looking for a boyfriend sitting at some corner of the library. and you guys should have seen his reaction when he asked:

him: you kat sini buat apa? (what are you doing here?)
me: tengah tunggu mak. (waiting for my mum)
him: MAK?! ALAMAK! k lincah lincah. your number ahh... (MUM!? ALAMAK! k quick quick. your number ahh)

he terperanjat beruk sia. you should have seen his face. it was so funny, i was trying really hard to surpress my laughter. LOL. but just go away and dont harass me.

SIX.
miss universe 2008 is miss venezuela. pity. i prefer miss columbia. she's so gorgeous and sweet and i LOVE her evening wear PLUS she has GREAT ABS. -jaw drops. and i dislike very much miss spain. she's like so irritating and she was trying to exude this: im-so-damn-hot-you-just-have-to-pick-me-otherwise-i'll-get-stuck-in-fhm-international-magazine face. UGH.

SEVEN.
i decided not to blow dry my hair today after shower. and woofoo, nice WAVY, soft hair babes. i thank god for my lovely hair.

i think that's all for now that i can remember.

OH YEA. farah hidayati! if you're reading this, this thurs witch yoo hee??? :D :D looking forward!

till then. i love you guys. all of you in my present life.

blurry - puddle of mudd.

Everything’s so blurry, and everyone’s so fake
And everybody’s empty, and everything is so messed up
Preoccupied without you, I cannot live at all
my whole world surrounds you, I stumbled and I crawl
you could be my someone you could be my scene
You know that I’ll protect you from all of the obscene
I wonder what you’re doing Imagine where you are
There’s oceans in between us, and that’s not very far

Can you take it all away Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face, This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face

Everyone is changing, there’s no one left that’s real
So make up your own ending, and let me know just how you feel
Cause I am lost with out you, I cannot live at all
my whole world surrounds you, I stumbled and I crawl
you could be my someone you could be my scene
You know that I will save you from all of the unclean
I wonder what you’re doin I wonder where you are
There’s oceans in between us but that’s not very far

2008-07-11T23:38:00.003+08:00

there's something to look back to now.
and nooks.
goodbye nooks, goodbye kids, goodbye to the angst ive never felt before.

it's a weird feeling though. they're little niceties; little prats; lovely kids.
goodbye. for good and good.

and there's many things to say. but i'll just leave it at that now.

now, i have freedom.

2008-07-10T22:45:00.002+08:00

im supposed to be doing some work right now, but here i am, scarring some blog of mine.

i have something to declare.
for the first time in my whole entire life, i was ANGRY.
my bubble didnt BURST WITH GUSTO but it did burst.
being the girl that i've always been, i choose to ignore that anger and went on with class patiently (amazing i could do that sia).
i guess i've never scolded anyone apart from my brother. and i dont tengking people. i was on the verge of SCREAMING! at those kids. but all i did was to tell a student quietly "dont test my patience." i cant believe im so "kind". and to just top off that anger with whipped cream, another student had to mention "TEACHER, YOU GOT PATIENCE AH?!"

JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE.
*sorry for the vulgarity

that totally pushed my limits. but i was so pissed with that comment that all i managed to do was say loudly "SHUT UP" and rolled my eyes at him. i wanted to cry man. but i didnt cos i kept on being reminded of faz's: my patience is only this much (with her face and gestures all) so it sort of lifted my mood.

IM JUST A RELIEF OK.
even if you dont like the damn subject, at least respect me ah. even if you dont want to respect me then just shut the hell up in my class and mind your own business la.
~~fuck. teaching spastic kids beats teaching them sia.~~
and bloody hell, i have another lesson with them tmr.

work is really mounting. it's not exactly mounting. i can finish it. but the testsssssssssss. it's taking a huge portion of my time. i feel so drained. it sucks. teaching a subject you arent all that proficient at, sucks. teaching a subject that students dont give a toot about sucks. but the subject doesnt suck. they just cant appreciate the language.

i'll psycho myself.
TMR WILL BE A GOOD DAY.

damn you class.

2008-07-08T21:26:00.002+08:00

IM DAMN TIRED SIAAAAAAAAAAA.

today rly sucked. ): like. i was supposed to have only one lesson but eventually i only had ONE BREAK. OI. )))):

i must stress. IM DAMN TIRED SIAAAAAAAAAAAA.

went to meet faz after schl tdy to "chill" at starbucks. and we exchanged little stories. ahh. it's so calming to see her. then she came over and we chilled further. i told her i wanted to fart 3 times. since then she kept on asking if i farted. but no smell. :D
WHAT IS THIS OBSCENE INFORMATION THAT IM TYPING?!
whatever.

and ms faz passed me her lethargic-ness suddenly and im so tired now (aftermath of tdy's madness of trying to think what to do what to do and more what to do questions)
there's so much work waiting for me. and i just HAVE to:
prepare more lessons=more students getting bored.
i cant help it kids.

and my brother's counting down to my 15-minute (SHUT UP LUQMAN HAKIM B LOKMAN: LET ME TYPE IN PEACE) time limit. IT'S 9.35 I SWEAR.

anyway, since im not attending the refugezeroaid camp this week(due to work), i hope and wish my little girlfriends will organise a little camp tgt.

i wanna rot, pig and drive around at 3 am in the morning with you guys. :D
holland v anyone? (:

LOVES.

p/s. it's only 9.31 sia. OI! DONT PUNCH ME AH. PAIN SIA.

2008-07-05T22:47:00.003+08:00

THE DIPLOMA PRAC IS FINALLY OVER.

it was good i suppose. i did on dance. it was like quite weird and i started talking all the nonsense about dance. i only managed to get to the objectives. didnt even get to show any video. so downloading the vids were like a waste of time. wtf. but the best part: everybody participated! i wasnt asked much questions but i was made to invite a person from the audience to learn a bit of dance steps. HAHAHAHA. so i happily invited my mum to teach her how to do a first and a demi plie. and what the hell. i dont even know how to do them properly. so just teach her anyhow la. based on what i see in the picture i pasted on my portfolio. HAHAHAHHAHAHA. :D

i was quite irritated just now because it was already so cold, i needed to pee and i was stressed cos the questions posed by the examiner was like fcuking hard so i was worrying about mine. and my mum just had to last minute ask me do a powerpoint for her cos she didnt have any. WAHHHHHHLAUUUU. so i was kinda pissed. what last minute. it really didnt help when i need to pee.

in anycase, the dip is OVERRRRR!

i can now start marking all the karangan, kefahaman, akhbar all that ive been putting on hold cos was making this presentation (turned out didnt have to hand up a presentation but a portfolio instead which was only informed 2 nights before the prac). and i can also focus on preparing lessons and get those damned tests done.

holy. making MALAY tests are damn (insert a very very very negative word here) difficult. SIGH. i jsut need some kefahaman help. ): the imbuhan all i do alr. except sec 2. SIALA. im not even a qualified malay teacher who knows all these techniques. ):

SOME KIND SOUL PLEASE HELP!

ok. on monday, frisbee challenge! :D
tmr, SHOPPINGGGGG!
nextweek, MUST SHOP FOR MUM'S PRESENT. anyone wanna come with meeeee?

LOVE!

2008-07-01T17:03:00.002+08:00

~~i called him a bird and i have no idea why i called him a bird. what the hell?~~

and so another day at school passed. well i guess tdy was better and more fulfilling. i mean i managed to keep the class going and i think all these "no talking in english" campaign is really good. although it's too early to say whether they've improved, i can see them churning out new words. and that includes me. we had some forfeit thing going on and even i got forfeited and my forfeit is atrocious. i gotta buy them coke! what is this! okay. i think i shall change that coke to something healthier.

and i finally know why im am not an angry person. thanks to faz's literary read. read the excerpt below. maybe you'll finally be able to understand yourself.

"Don't Get Mad. Get Wise (Why no one ever makes you angry... ever!)".

Whenever you become angry, it is because you have an image in your mind of how things should be, how people should behave, how events should unfold, and the external reality is not matching the image in your mind.Anger comes when you are not inwardly flexible enough to accept that outward reality is always going to be different from your preconceptions, expectations and desires. In fact, your anger is a sign that you are trying and failing to control other people and events. You have not yet realised that you cannot control other people or events. The world is not designed to waltz to the sound of your swing band. This is why anger is often referred to as a moment of insanity. You are clinically insane!

Attachment is a mistake we all make within our consciousness and it creates what is known as ego.

We must come to realise that everything in life comes and goes, everythign decays, every dynamic process is unpredictable and uncontrallable, and must end. Stuff happens! Everytime you get angry it means you are having an argument with this reality. Once again, not exactly a very enlightened way to live.

for me, i realise i put very little attachment to whatever that revolves around my life. except for that one particular person, my brother and my parents. they're the only people i get really angry with. i let the others come and go easily. i dont like the feeling of anger and thus even when im angry it's only for....10 minutes? HMMMM. maybe i dont care after all how other people behave cos it's completely their choice and i am nobody to tell them what to do.

WHATEVER BOY. just go away now and i'll let you use the com. goodbye. continue next time.

2008-06-30T22:22:00.002+08:00

):

i just read something. sarcastic or not?
gah, it rly sounds disgusting to me la.
i just try to do my best and make lessons interesting enough cos i know malay is potentially boring, but i dont know how man. honestly.
so please darling dearest whoever kind enough to enlighten me with what you think might be boring or interesting to do during malay lessons that you think will have an impact the student's malay language abilities.

sigh. a suggestion by a helpful student online was to do a drama.
GODDDDDDD. it's sounds so simple to do but so difficult to prepare. ive got to get resources, ideas and whatever else.

i'm sure it'll be fun la. i mean i've never done that in my whole entire life. so it'l be refreshing for me.

anyway, i realise, being in an elite school for years have made me feel like a total dork in front of all these students from neighbourhood schools (not that i am degrading them). i mean, i've been surrounded by studious students and competitive students and environment that requires us to excel academically and at the same time aesthetically. BUT, students from neighbourhood schools in a way gain so much more. maybe they are not all brains like nerds or what but they're really street smart and very observant of cultures and behaviours. they know stuff students from elite schools (or "budak baik" schools) are less knowledgable in. they are really open.

i mean come one, one look at me, you know i was that innocent kid who completes most of her work on time though i have the same grouses as every other student in the world. and when school is over it really means over - time to head home baby and watch tv a while then start homework. it just comes naturally like a routine. but others have a life. what life did i have?
just school and purely school.

and due to that, i feel like a total dork. i feel i cant connect with the kids im teaching very well. superficially, it looks ok, i understand how they feel and all (like a potentially boring malay lesson) but there's just something lacking. i have to adjust to their situations and it's hard for me cos my malay lessons have always been fun no matter what we do cos we have great friends sharing that boring/fun/disgusting moment with us..

thus, now, it's making me wonder, school cant be boring can it? and if you have your good friend(s) sitting next to you, my malay lesson cant be boring. i mean doing malay is like just another task to do while enjoying your friends' company.

OH GOD. it's hard.

i dunno. if only my relief students can read this and enlighten me with ideas and thoughts that'll channel through my head and improve their malay lives.
im sorry.

anyway, i actually came to blog about something else and i end up spending 20 min talking about something that came up moments ago.

lunched with faz at delifrance bistro tdy. KELAS! she was telling me stuff. hahahahahhahaha. and somehow, i cant wait for her to find a boyfriend or some guy she really really really really really likes. HAHAHHAHA. i can listen to all her stories! :D and her random thoughts. ((:

lols. and here, im emphasising once again that im NOT a minah and neither do i have "blood" with minah msia. PLEASE.

hakimah is in her own league. *shakes eyebrows*

goodnight guys.

p.s// ive yet to complete that dastard of a presentation and i just gotta prepare some broing lesson for tmr.
DEAR GOD, ENLIGHTEN ME COS ONLY YOU CAN SHOW ME THE WAY.

2008-06-27T00:29:00.003+08:00

look at the time.
WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE?!

and so, another day in the life of (insert my full name here).
i finally met up with my dearest darling whom i havent seen in the longest longest time!
after schl, met up with her at far east and started shopping. didnt even eat or sit.
basically we shopped for 2.5 happy hours. total shopping though short.

the plan:
nurul to buy a heel and another black shoe.
dianah to buy a sneaker.

the outcome:
nurul bought one black shoe.
dianah bought one sneaker, one slipper and one shoe.

THAT'S T-H-R-E-E DIANAH! let's take them out of the cupboard slowly so that the governing body at home doesnt flare when they seem them.

HAHA. there was even the ZARA sale! so much for sales. still unaffordable for us rather-spend-money-on-food kids. so we left ZARA with "f***! you better not tell me you wanna try the top. look at the f***ing line!" there were at least 15-20 people in the queue for 5 fitting rooms. and tey're all holding more than 2 pieces of clothing.

conclusion: "SALE", KICK(S) SOME BUTT!
*note underlying meaning.

and relief teaching at peirce is ok i think. for now. but haha. how unsurprisingly, they take their own sweet time in the world to complete my homework.

but haha. eyecandy is still cute but no more eyecandy-ing.

DAVID DAVID DAVID DAVID cook is love.
and so is JUSTIN.

2008-06-17T17:09:00.003+08:00

ive been wanting to go out.

but i havent. either lazy or too lazy.
what the chickens. so much for wanting go out.

1. caspian.
2. sex and the city.
3. kung fu panda (again)
4. the love guru.
5. you dont mess with the zohan.

WOAH. that'll add up to $50+++

now i know why people need money. but i dont seem to want it so bad. HAHA.
what the hell, shut up.

i wanna drive to rail mall for coffee bean and chill. (: would wee hoe treat me again? HMMM.

shameless sia!

2008-06-16T14:03:00.007+08:00

im home babes.

went to pulau pemanggil. amazing place i must say. there's so much to say actually but i'll just make it short and sweet. lanting beach resort is definitely a great hideaway from the technologies of life and stress. it was like a corner of the earth in the vast sea and there were no devices to connect yourself with the rest of the world (i mean the private world we live in). there was no tv, no radio, no phone (unless you have autoroam and keep on messaging or calling your friends, but that rly defeats the purpose) absolutely nothing. i even brought my mps3 along to keep me from boredom but i must say, nomatter how bored you think you are but you're actually not. it's very calming to hear the waves and listen to the wind. i culd sit there and do just that for days.

PERFECT STRESS RELIEVER.

here's a view from the stools outside the room.

there are seriously a lot more pictures. but i'm too lazy to upload it.

it's photos galore now.a couple of photos from escape trip with ama faz and laila, my chocolate coated strawberries, my lovely sugar cookies - iced and un-iced, wau competition (:

that's all girls! (:

see ya soon! (:

2008-06-11T23:59:00.003+08:00

if i could use cards to represent problems.

i'd lay:
5 cards on the table for my dad.
and a few cards for the rest of the family.

i can feel the weight of his problems man. it's big time heavy. i feel so sad that my dad has a lot of problems while i was basically problem free only short term problems that arent possibly of any importance compared to his. sigh. i dont understand how life can be extremely difficult. ): but im pretty sure, god wouldnt put you through it if He didnt think you could make it. GOD'S FAIR after all. (:

i baked sugar cookies all by myself and they're REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD! :D

ohwells. i'd love to do delivery to some lovely friends but time forbids. im going holiday to some island in mersing, msia. so no time. i'll be back on sunday though (:

and i drove for the first time in my life, ALONE! woohoo! from thomson to home. (:

cool babe. i was driving safely cos it was like 7.30pm and many many cars around so max i went was 80km/h. and i parked the car so cool man. ok whatever.

and so i think i post up photos when i come back. for now, i just gotta go man.

and guess what i heard the boat trip from mersing is 4.5 hrs! OMG. im just gonna die la. i was more like wanting a genting holiday. oh well. i'll come back on sunday! loves!

here's a david cook to <3!

THERE IS ONE THING
FOR A MOMENT IN TIME
AND IT SEEMED EVERLASTING
THAT YOU WOULD ALWAYS BE MINE

NOW YOU WANNA BE FREE
AND SO IM LETTING YOU FLY
COS YOU KNOW IN MY HEART BABE
OUR LOVE WILL NEVER DIE
NO...

YOU'LL ALWAYS BE A PART OF ME
I'M PART OF YOU INDEFINITELY
GIRL DONT YOU KNOW YOU CANT ESCAPE ME
OH DARLING COS YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY BABY

AND WE LINGER ON
TIME CANT ERASE A FEELING THIS STRONG
NO WAY YOU NEVER GONNA SHAKE ME
OH DARLING COS YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY BABY

I AINT GONNA CRY NO
NOW I BEG YOU TO STAY
IF YOU'RE DETERMINED TO LEAVE GIRL
I WILL NOT STAND IN YOUR WAY

BUT IF IT EVER BE
YOU'LL BE BACK AGAIN
COS YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART BABE
OUR LOVE WILL NEVER END

CHORUS.

I KNOW THAT YOU'LL BE BACK GIRL
WHEN YOUR DAYS AND YOUR NIGHT GET A LITTLE BIT COLDER
I KNOW THAT YOU'LL BE RIGHT BACK OH..
OH BABY BELIEVE ME IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME

CHORUS.

YOU WILL ALWAYS BE..
OOH DARLING COS YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY BABY..

ALWAYS BE MY BABY.

2008-06-08T20:32:00.002+08:00

i guess it wasnt just about getting the license.

before this, i was dying to get that license. now that i've gotten that oh-so-coveted license with my pretty photo on it, it's like, "ok i got the license alr. so?" that's a real turn off. learning to drive was much more fun. i honestly rather learn to drive NOW than to already KNOW how to drive.

i guess it's really in me. i like to LEARN. it's a great feeling to LEARN or STUDY or the likes. i can spend my life just studying, pursuing one degree and another and another and another. whatever, STUDYING GIVES ME THE VIBES AND I GET A KICK OUT OF IT. really.

all you non-school-loving people can curse me whatever. it's just my opinion.

and i saw this at bpp carpark tdy.

HAHAHA. you'll get a condom delivery if you sms some number. i took a photo with the licence plate of the van but i think i'll protect them. (though i think they'll be grateful for free advertisement. (: ) but do leave a message on my tagboard if you want their number. and im sorry, i just dont provide services. only to give their number. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

love!

2008-06-06T09:20:00.002+08:00

YO.

i have been like MIA just cos i was busy busy busy studying for the dip. there's so many things to say!

k number one.
I PASSED PASSED PASSED MY TP! :D
so i can oficially drive around now. have yet to go for a spin but im shaking! esp the jaguar. the bmw, i drove it in msia alr. just around the carpark at some country club so shouldnt be too bad. but what are the odds i drive the bmw? close to zero unless at night or weekends. but, i doubt i'll do that maybe once or twice but not always. the jaguar most probably it'll be my main driving car. ;)

so guys, i can drive you guys around a bit now, provided i have the money for petrol. i cant simply tap my dad's speedpass right!

woohoo! alhamdulillah!
____________________________________

number two.
i sat for the diploma test ytd. it was tiring. worse than lit test or econs test or even history test! though the last time i did a history test was like in sec two. yea. there were only like 5 ladies taking the test and TONS of guys around ranging from 19/20 to as old as 49 i think! or older. still. my dad was the ultimate. it was a test and he even answered a call! HAHAHAHAHHA. and he came in the latest for the test and he just sat anyhow, didnt even check for his seat. HAHAHAH. omg. consperm he hasnt been to school for 2415534 years. :D but it's over now. only practical and i've yet to think of a topic to talk about. ):
____________________________________

number three.
i went out with faz to look for her book and the pants. eventually bought the book but no pants. HAHAHA. she was rly excited about some stuff!! -shakes eyebrows- and i rly wanna see that much talked about creation of god! woohoo!
____________________________________

number four.
i had the weirdest dream! the other night, i dreamt i was a poor tiny little type of wild cat (those safari kind) and this tyrannical big brown and black cat (like a jag) was chasing me to my death. i was running for my life for like ever. we then transformed to a human form. apparently, my mum w--- [OMG I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THE KARIPAP AND IT'S LIKE DAMN BLACKENED NOW. ): my mum just scolded me.] where was i. oh yea. apparently my mum was also running everywhere with me. we were running with bars of chocolate! can you believe that?! from willy wonka to cadbury and van houten and mnm's. the chocs kept on dropping but i kept picking them up. some were even torn and chocolate were exposed. ):

then we came to this shopping centre and we decided to run into the tyrant's shop. cos last time when i was younger, i used to always go to his shop and he doted on me. he is my uncle by the way. we tried to push the door open, with what we have cos my hands were filled with bars of chocolates and my mum was carrying some bag, but it wouldnt budge cos there was a big box blocking it so we had to pull it. when we entered we realised: uh-oh wrong place to come. cos the tyrant was there and there was this menacing looking skinny of a man with curling moustache, saying, there's not place to hide now. then we clambered out and tried to open the back door of the neighbouring shop but it wouldnt budge either. so we ran out of the shopping centre door (and still dropping those chocs) and ran into the shop. the shop belonged to my teacher (and i have no idea who).

i hid the chocolates first then tried to hide myself, but i was too late so i just hid behind a teacher's table. the tyrant was a big burly man with bodybuilder built and he was wearing this tight fitting blue top.i was shaking with fright! he was looking for me, my mum was sitting calmly and the matresses with some other people i happen to know and the tyrant boomed, "where is she?! i know she's here! she cant hide from me!" by then i was tearing and sobbing quietly so he cant hear me. he was looking for me behind the table but i managed to hide somehow and he couldnt see me. i was crawling away from him. he said, "i know she's around the table somewhere but why cant i find her!?" he bent down, trying to look for my feet. i tried to jump! but my reaction was slow and he saw my left foot. "AHA! I FOUND YOU! YOU CANT HIDE NOW!" the next moment he towered over me, smiling sinisterly. i aws sobbing so hard! he tugged me up and squeezed my arm really hard, never letting go. i can never forget that evil smile.

"what did i do wrong to you or what did i do terribly wrong in my past life!" i begged him, sobbing really hard. like really hard. and everyone in that shop said it was my fate. "He likes you so much that he hates you." suddenly, we all transformed into cat forms again. the intimidating tyrant of a cat grabbed me by my neck like all other cats do and took me away, away from my mum. nobody saved me. i was sobbing so hard that i woke up, sobbing. there were even little drops of tears in my eyes.

it was a nightmare honestly. i really wonder. can anyone ever like someone so much that he hates her so badly. isn't that being selfish. in this dream, that tyrant was really selfish. he wanted me. kill me or what i dont know. but he was chasing me like a madman. he was roaring with anger and i didnt know why. it's really sad.

what a weird nightmare.
___________________________________

number five.
i went to the dance concert on 31 may!
the dance was really nice and i like the opening! where dancers came in from all doors. really really great idea. it was a circus! the alumni was excellent! i honestly think so. but one dancer really stood out. her hits were ZOMG SHARP AND FULL OF LIFE AND STRENGTH AND VIGOUR. that's none other than nicole yong! she's a really talented dancer i must say. and firefly was slightly different but still great! :D i loved it! and the kinda slutty dance was beyond slutty (in a good way) and refreshing. sadly though, the guest performers were like limelight. synchronized breakdance? WHOA. really really jawdropping. but all in all it was wonderful to watch them dancers again. (: (: bah. kinda regret a little didnt go back. but all was good! GREAT JOB DANCERS. YOU GUYS REALLY ROCKED THAT STAGE.
___________________________________

well, that's all for now. i'm gonna have to vacuum already, beore my mum comes back from her dental. i wanna go for a spin today but yet to buy my triangle. i could i forget to buy them ytd! ): ohwells.

going for lunch with twt later. meeting her at central at 2.
ESCAPE! WITH LOVELIES ON TUESDAY! DAMN LOOkING FORWARD TO IT! :D
driving to airport in the wee hours of the morning (ok not rly wee) 4.30? yea. to fetch my grandma. it'll be my first almost-across-the-country drive! :D

love ya guys. (:

2008-05-27T21:11:00.002+08:00

JAHANAM NAMPAK?! JAHANAM NAMPAK!?

omg. it's like the 'in' thing at home now. just change the coloured word to anything you want and irritate and sicken the other family member. OMG. just as im typing, my mum attacked me.

AND I GOTTA GO ON A DIET.
my weight is on the rise, painfully and slowly. it acts like a reminder for me to eat in moderation. but i just cant help popping stuff into my mouth! ): for example at 9.45 pm or later, i'd feel like eating a snack: ice cream or chips or chocolate. OMG. HIGH IN FAT FOOD. ))):

that's sad. and in the day, i have a HUGE APPETITE. ))): i can eat like two servings of food. and i baca bismillah know! dunno why still like that. this sucks man.

i have something to announce.
MY BROTHER IS KEMARUK(OBSSESSED) WITH BUILDING UP MUSCLES.
and he's like stick and bones like now and he tries to show off abs that he doesnt have and chest that is almost nothing (even when you wear specs or dont wear specs).
ok. maybe he's in that phase. whatever.

and im excited to watch cjdance concert this sat. ((:

good luck loveys.

it's now time to eat dinner. (omg look at the time!)

see ya.

2008-05-23T01:02:00.002+08:00

was with faz tdy! :DDDD

last day of schl for me and lets say goodbye to eyecandy. it's gonna be no more in a few days time. )):

eyes averted when she glances;
eyes averted when he glances.
perhaps something to say,
perhaps a misunderstanding;
but they're both pretty all the same.

2008-05-20T01:25:00.002+08:00

i just bombed $110 at robinsons for 2 mothers day bras and 2 bras for myself. when i came home my dad said: i didnt say you couldnt use the credit.

and weehoe just told me he lost weight.

kjadg34qu38vyroqjc8w3ct4yqpcoi310uc2lkhakfcht[aw[-4craserqcy2x9uhubr3gc28678bc4akvfeovsv

TSK. [for both]

anyway, that old guy there is crazy to give me this task! ):

im asking someone to go with me for the cj dance concert!
31may PAC sat 7.30PM

SEE YOU IN MY DREAMS BABY.

2008-05-14T22:18:00.002+08:00

BANGKOK WAS SHOPPER'S GALORE.

honestly.

my new purchases were 8/9 new tops, 3 WORKING pants, 3 skirts (which i badly need), 3 pairs of shoes, 2 belts, 1 handbag, 1 sling, and 18 bangles.

WOOHOO!

when we reached asia hotel it was alr night. i was too tired to start walking around so decided to just get instant noodles from 7eleven. but we went back, we realised there wasnt any kettle! dammit! ): so my mum said to go down to the said muslim foodstall along the road somewhere. but we couldnt find it after 45 min of searching. i was initially hungry but lost appetite after a while so we didnt eat.

called porn using the public phone just ouside asia hotel and I WAS EARNING MONEY FROM THE PHONE! for every baht i insert, i get another baht. eventually i earned some 3 or 4 bahts from the phone itself. LOL. poor people can rly make a living out of it. ahhaha.

on sunday we went chatuchak. OH MY HELL OF CHICKENS. it was absurdly huge that i think we only walked some 1/5 of the entire place? it was HOT and packed. can die of heat stroke there la. srsly. we walked at JJ MALL too. and ate some curried noodle. it was a 6 hours spent there and we only bought a tube dress and wooden bangles there. my mum bought plates which were plain but gorgeous! in the evening we went mbk. many things have changed since! legs aching!

on monday morning went pratunam and platinum. the place was filled to the brim with clothes and more clothes. the platinum shopping centre wasnt like any other shopping centre in sg. sg malls have like an atrium in the middle of something. but no! platinum: 360deg shops selling clothes, accessories, shoes, food. EVERYTHING BABE! spent like mad.

~~ah can die.~~

on tuesday we rushed to central world. but was halted halafway bya policeman who told us to shop at a thai local product shop. when we reached there by a tuktuk, it was those kind of place seling jewellery, sth we werent looking for. but i bought silk magnets there! then we hailed a tuktuk to take us to mbk.but the driver didnt want to take us there! so he made another tuktuk to take us there. but this tuktuk dirver was kinda kind and sincere. he told us to go to another thai local product factory aving a slae. we didnt want to go at all but he voiced his intention. he wanted to take us there so that he can get a "free petrol coupon" all we gotta do is to look around for 5-10 min. and then he'll take us to mbk for 20 baht only. OK! but when he finally sent us to opposite mbk, he said "FREE! NO PAY" woo! free ride babe. what kind soul. (:

so we shopped for a while more and lunch-ed before heading back to asia hotel to checkout. then we went to central. we only bought cik tiqah's "sexy maxi" bra. and walked around a bit. cos that palce was too posh and too expensive. not within our budget in bkk, so we left and headed back to platinum. we found bro's shirt. and bought nothing else. lol.

and so we came back with a trolley bag full of clothes, bags and shoes. nak katakan, the clothes we bought werent that many and the bag was bare minimum and shoes were just not enough. i should have bought more shoes and bags. but. though sg shoes are generally more expensive, it's much much nicer.

SHOPPING WAS FUN. (:

off shopping for 3 days starting today!

didnt take that many photos, cos it wasnt a sightseeing thing. so i ended up snapping randomly at weird times.

my mum said when i dont smile with my teeth bared, i look like a joker. ):

2008-05-10T08:43:00.003+08:00

and before i leave,

i woke up and saw a rainbow right in front of my house!

it's really heartwarming and exhilarating to see it very early in the morning!

2008-05-07T21:32:00.004+08:00

there are many many things to say but right now, i only remember one thing.

BEAUFFET! (pronounced as beau-fay)

holy chickens! the food was good! i had a hell of a time and ive gained weight because of that!

i actually gave up after a good 40 min but i gained back my stamina to eat after resting for 10 min and i ate more!

here are some photos. it's a must-bring-dianah-to-pig feast kind of place. so when, girl!

2008-05-02T22:30:00.002+08:00

ah. shit. i just feel like blogging.

ANYWAY.here goes another day of my life.

i never elt so lost and bogged down with such huge responsibility before till on wednesday when a particular man told me of a rather shocking news that deprived me of sleep for two days. i kept on waking up at 3 thinking it was 6. at 5.30 thinking it was 6. at 5.45 thinking it was 6! but i just couldnt wait for the sun to rise and allow me to go to school! and SEARCH!

but alhamdullilah, after friday prayers today, everything was solved! :D

THEN.

today at 1515 hrs i had the faculty of science interview. HOLY SHIT SON OF A BITCH. ):
i screwed it up like a fool and i couldnt find the right words. i seriously cant speak formally AT ALL under the eagle eyes of an interviewer who looked as though he would gladly swallow me down his throat. ):

but it's over now. time to hope and pray.

insyallah, i'll get science fac offer and do math.

oh yea. one thing, when you like something you dont have to have a particular reason why you like it. eg "So, why your interest in math?" because, i just like it?! like i jsut like it! please dont ask me again and again.

and i really cant promote myself. eg,
so tell us why we should offer you this place in science fac?
reply: ERRR....hauvy3b4ox7a2vvo4uihavq254p9u. yea.

WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKK.

who cares babe. allah penentu segala. (: amin.

2008-05-01T19:32:00.002+08:00

im no longer emotion-deficient.
really.

and i swear, school is the best place to be. whether you're a student or a teacher.
and during this period, i'm actually enjoying it. though sometimes after school, i'd be alone since everyone else is working and bestie is now schooling. ): so then i head home.

anyway, ONE THOUGHT.

WHY MUST PEOPLE LINK THE COLOUR PINK WITH DANCE?
why cant it be lavender or violet or sky blue or green for that matter?
it's like stereotyping.

just when im re-blogging, bestie abandoned her blog. i remember abandoning mine too when i felt i wanted to let go. i did. now, it's a new beginning.

i was under the impression that everything was in place. but i was a fool.
you've bloomed, fool.
live your life the way you want it to be. stand up for your own rights.
there's no one to tell you who you're supposed to be cos you know what you want.
people can be bitches or jerks or appear as stumbling blocks. but they cant stop you from what you feel you think you believe.
you were wrong. now that's you've learnt, make it right.
love yourself more girl. love others too.

2008-04-29T11:33:00.002+08:00

THE WEATHER IS INSANE.

i'm in school, yo.

2008-04-19T12:36:00.002+08:00

i havent been posting since aeons ago. but i've a purpose now.

i have one extremely important thing to write about to free myself from the past and it acts as a closure for a phase in my life. only then can i move on. but i shall leave that to a time when im ready to write it. i wrote it halfway, and felt the time just wasnt right.

but right now, i want to share this.

PAULO COELHO: THE ZAHIR

how many people in the world out there have read this thought provoking book? life is full of mysteries. and the one subject that The Zahir seems to revolve around is LOVE.

well, love is a beautiful thing aint it? but love is subjective. it is still complex to me. do you know?

theres also another subject: FREEDOM.

trust me, i have very little freedom. but then again, freedom is subjective. it depends on how you look at it. so tell me on your thoughts about freedom; FOSB.

heres two excerpts which is self explanatory, worth thinking about:

"That is why it is so important to let certain things go. To release them. To cut loose. People need to understand that no one is playing with marked cards; sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Don't expect to get anything back, don't expect recognition for your efforts, don't expect your genius to be discovered or your love to be understood. Complete the circle. Not out of pride, inability, or arrogance but simply because whatever it is no longer fits in your life. Close the door, change the record, clean the house, get rid of the dust. Stop being who you were and become who you are."

"The acomodador or giving-up point: there is always an event in our lives that is responsible for us failing to progress: a trauma, a particular bitter defeat, a disappointment in love, even a victory that we did not quite understand, can make cowards of us and prevent us from moving on. As part of the process of increasing his hidden powers, the shaman must first set free himself from that giving-up point and, to do so, he must review his whole life and find out where it occured."

and i have Paulo Coelho for that, to thank.

but after reading the last line, i dont quite understand. im confused.

2008-01-21T12:54:00.000+08:00

OMG. HAHAHAHA. i typed www.blogger.com and it brought me straight to my account! zomg.

OKAY. IM LEAVING. i forgot my password. shit. BYE

2007-06-10T11:46:00.000+08:00

HELLO ALL!

schl holidays left two weeks. i havent gone out with anyone except my mum. ):
anyway. BIG GROOVE CONCERT IS TODAY! but i freaking cant go. ):
this is damn sad lah. never mind!

THANK YOU CLAIRE AND DAPH FOR FINDING A PERSON TO GO!
at least the ticket wont go to waste! (: yay.

alright. for those three kids on the block:
i think all of us didnt go for the wedding. harhar. and the album, ive sent to you! (:
hahahhahahahah.
IM TAKEN I THINK SHE WENT PRETTY TO THE WEDDING. okay private joke. HAHAHAHHA.

LOVEEE.

p/s.here's a little something i got through email two years ago. (:

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

mercy of allah

A man woke up early in order to pray the Fajr prayer in the masjid. He
got dressed, made his aboloution and was on his way to the masjid.

On his way to the masjid, the man fell and his clothes got dirty. He got
up, brushed himself off, and headed home. At home, he changed his
clothes, made his aboloution, and was, again, on his way to the masjid.

2nd time, On his way to the masjid, he fell again and at the same spot!
He, again, got up, brushed himself off and headed home. At home he, once
again, changed his clothes, made his aboloution and was on his way to
the masjid.

On his way 3rd time to the masjid, he met a man holding a lamp. He asked
the man of his identity and the man replied "I saw you fall twice on
your way to the masjid, so I brought a lamp so I can light your way."

The first man thanked him profusively and the two where on their way to
the masjid. Once at the masjid, the first man asked the man with the
lamp to come in and pray Fajr with him. The second man refused. The
first man asked him a couple more times and, again, the answer was the
same. The first man asked him why he did not wish to come in and pray.

The man replied "I am Satan."

The man was shocked at this reply. Satan went on to explain, "I saw you
on your way to the masjid and it was I who made you fall. When you went
home, cleaned yourself and went back on your way to the masjid, Allah
forgave all of your sins. I made you fall a second time, and even that
did not encourage you to stay home, but rather, you went back on your
way to the masjid. Because of that, Allah forgave all the sins of the
people of your household. I was afraid if i made you fall one more time,
then Allah will forgive the sins of the people of your village, so I
made sure that you reached the masjid safely."

2007-06-04T17:28:00.000+08:00

i read this in my mail: adapted.

I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed devil, in the Name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful.

Zikr is the Arabic term for remembrance of Allah, the Most Merciful. It is not restricted to the prayer and worship that we do on our prayer rugs five times a day; it is much more than that.

If we strive to remember Him, He will help us, as this Hadith narrated by Anas in Sahih Bukhari describes: The Prophet said, "Allah says: 'I am just as My slave thinks I am, (i.e. I am able to do for him what he thinks I can do for him) and I am with him if He remembers Me. If he remembers Me in himself, I too, remember him in Myself; and if he remembers Me in a group of people, I remember him in a group that is better than they; and if he comes one span nearer to Me, I go one cubit nearer to him; and if he comes one cubit nearer to Me, I go a distance of two outstretched arms nearer to him; and if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running.' "

the take away message is:
The greatest form of Zikr though is the fear of Allah.

yeah. that's all about it. i know it's religious based. but really. i feel this is a good entry.

love Allah; for He loves you even more.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

for those waiting for photos to be uploaded and to be sent, im really sorry. the whole shit is screwed up i'll do some now. (: LOVE!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

back to daily life, i WANNA GO FOR RETAIL THERAPY!

people i wanna go out with/owe:

1. my mum
2. dianah, fazliah, ama
3. bernice, chenise, denise
4. jocelyn!
5. girls of t27
6. a lot more of them!

of course there's iss! :DDD

take care y'all. see you soon! (:

2007-05-19T10:35:00.000+08:00

ALYA IRDINA

she's new addition to the big family ((:
only one day old. okay not even one day.
12 HOURS OLD!

muahahahha.

okay. im pretty lazy to blog. OHWELLS. goodbye!

OHYA. YTD WAS SPORTS CARNIVAL. heh. played handball. we got thrashed badly by 24, 9-2! and won 34, 2-0! and finally lost to 19, 4-3! BLAH.

goodgame everyone! i seriously enjoyed that carnival. better the the previous. (:

LOVE!

2007-05-12T17:02:00.000+08:00

its halfway through may already!

ages since i blogged. like zomg.

IVE BEEN STAYING HOME ALL DAY AND IM GETTING BORED. I DONT REALLY LIKE TO STAY HOME ON WEEKENDS! BLAH.

i wanna wanna wanna dress up and go OUT.
"TWO WORDS: OUT!" hahahhahaha. classic.

yknow, i think skies should be blue. wtf. it's already bloo.
then i shall think that sports cars should be sold at a cheaperrrr price so i can own them. i shall want a sports car of my own. i will get my future husband to buy for me.
my future husband shall be a kind man. right! :DDD oh yknow, there was this girl about 6 years i think, i saw on the road. she was damn cute. she's so pretty i can see her being a sweet charming young lady that most guys will fall for. ballz! okay.

as you can see im spouting nonsense that has no link to anything. IM BORED.

alright! see you around! (:

<333333

2007-05-01T13:24:00.000+08:00

emo limo!

UPDATE UPDATE FOR UPCOMING ACTIVITY:
IM GOING TO MEET THE LITTLE CAPTAIN, SAKUNTALA KOH AND TINGGGGGG ON 12TH MAY!
woohoo!

and ytd was called VIVO-DAY!

okay update later.
now i need to go. SEE YOU!

2007-04-28T22:03:00.000+08:00

GOLD.

happy! :D

on thursday, waited anxiously for results to come back, literally. and we were screaming when we saw mrs koh and mdm phang. THANK YOU TEACHERS for all your support.

thank you dance for giving me one of the best experiences of my life. it had been a journey filled with emotions and i am greatly honoured to have been part of it. thank you cjdance. <3

on friday went vivocity to buy stuff from candy empire and to miss it. ): Haiyah. eventually we just went on a tour. heh. REALLY GOOD TIME HERE, THERE, EVERYWHERE. love.

anyway, i will upload all the photos once the stupid software doesnt hang on me. URGH.

AND MUSE IS <3.
supermassive black hole is getting me hooked bad. i can get all jittery and jumpy and happy and imagine something (AHEM!) ZEXXY in front of me. HEH. (:

J.T somewhat give the same effect but not as bad as MUSE (<333)!

Oh baby dont you know I suffer?
Oh baby can you hear me moan?
You caught me under false pretences
How long before you let me go?

You set my soul alight
You set my soul alight

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the 'supermassive'

I thought I was a fool for no-one
Oh baby I'm a fool for you
You're the queen of the superficial
And how long before you tell the truth

You set my soul alight
You set my soul alight

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the 'supermassive'

Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole

Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

(You set my soul alight)
Glaciers melting in the dead of night
And the superstars sucked into the supermassive

Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole
Supermassive black hole

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (the clazzic scream)
my gooodness, let me faint and die now. -faints.

TILL THEN.
i love love love love you!

2007-04-25T21:42:00.000+08:00

SYF: 25 APRIL 2007.
OH THE JOY!

pre
met up at the bench!
dismissed at 8 from schl. so basically we just attended for assembly.
changed into costume immediately and started tying hair, put on contacts, sprayed hair, gelled hair, re-tied hair, foundation, eyeliner, drawing of eyebrows, eyeshadow, bronzer, silver-er!
WHOO! ALL THE MAKEUP.
M.A.C. i swear. its good. putting on was easy. removing it was easy too. i like it.
M.A.C. !
did two runs. one was alright. second was better. and off we went.
took bus ride. and when we came in, all heads turned.
obviously to look at the mohawk on the guys. they were exceptionally hot.
we saw all other schls and their costumes. one hard freaking scary and disturbing make up on them. and some had pretty costumes. some were gold and rj was white and red or sth. cool.
then we touched up, warmed up and we waited for damn long. we were jumping up and down and shaking everywhere to keep ourselves warm.
and when we entered, we saw hwa chong dancing. my goodness. their props are like umbrellas and gangway and boys. and some of their steps were similar.
who cares. WE WERE GONNA DO OUR THING.

the dance
the adrenaline rush when we ran in. -keeping in mind: SHINE THROUGH.
when music plays. -keeping in mind: THIS IS IT.
BREATHE!
off we go. we stretched to our limits and gave feeling. -sending forth the message: WE HAVE COME THUS FAR, NOW SEE US.
i felt the first song. and we made through the walking! WOOHOO!
second song: nicole's part was shiok. seriously.
and we were joyous little fireflies bouncing and dancing. i could extremely feel it. i was giggling with delight! :D
our three groups never looked so perfect before! REALLY.
third song: JUST WHACK IT. NO TURNING BACK BABY.
we all whacked like we have never whacked anyone/anything before. TWEEEEEE.
the feeling was sensational throughout.
I WISH WE COULD ALL BE THERE AGAIN.

post
we came out screaming like wild people.
it was only a matter of seconds that it was all done and we did it.

WE DID IT, CJDANCE. :D

off-topic
i tried hard to see you. eg stepping out at 9, hoping.
passed mars. but you had to study. ok. (:
staying a while at 1 at the hall.
but all to no avail.
hoping you'd come. but i know you wouldnt.
and while standing and sitting there feeling all nervous and crippled, i wish you were there.
ohboy.

ICE CREAM TMR.
OUT ON FRIDAY. (:

~~study all the way later.~~

2007-04-24T22:27:00.000+08:00

ONE MORE DAY.

and we'll do that ONE chance, ONE shot, ONE ALL.

lets do our best, dance! :D

till then, ive been listening to the song on repeat mode since 830 till now. how many times is that? nvm.

anyway, im here. after syf, im gonna give my best to my studies. really i NEED HELP BIG TIME.

so long. (:

LET'S FEEL.

2007-04-22T23:40:00.000+08:00

I JUST MADE A NEW DISCOVERY. (:

OKAY NTHG TO DO WITH ANYTHING BUT COLDPLAY! :D

there's actually two versions of "TALK" by coldplay. `MMM.
here goes:

version one. (the one i dont have)

Oh brother I can’t, I can't get through
I've been trying hard to reach you 'cause I don't know what to do
Oh brother I can't believe it's true
I'm so scared about the future and I wanna talk to you
Oh I wanna talk to you

You can take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or a write a song nobody has sung or do
Something that's never been done

Are you lost or incomplete?
Do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece?
Tell me how do you feel?
Well I feel like they're talking in a language I don't speak
And they’re talking it to me

So you take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or a write a song nobody has sung or do
Something that's never been done, do
Something that's never been done

So you don't know where you're going and you wanna talk
And you feel like you're going where you've been before
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored
Nothing's really making any sense at all, let's talk
Let's talk, let's talk, let's talk

version two. (the one i have)

Under the great North star
Try to work out where you are
In the silence of the sea
I don't know where I'll be

In the future, in the past
Going nowhere... much too fast
When I go there, go with me
When I go there, go with me

Cause I don't know where I'm going and I wanna talk
I feel like I'm going where I've been before
And I wanna talk
Take a picture of
Something that you're not sure of
Bring it back to show to me
But I don't know what I see

In the future, find a home
Getting nowhere on your own
Got to find your missing piece

Cause you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Nothing's really making any sense at all
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored

Let's talk
Let's talk
Do you wanna talk

I'm [unknown]
I'm trying to sing a song
In a language I don't speak

I tried but I can't get through
I'm trying to get to you
But you’re difficult to reach
Won't you talk to me

So you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Let's talk
Let's talk

either one. LET'S TALK. i wanna talk to you! TAHAHAHHA. :D

2007-04-22T17:57:00.000+08:00

ALO?

wow. long time long time.

syf is in three more days. till then i need a lot a lot of feeling.

anyway. life is going good. right? (: twee.
im sure you can testify for that. `mmm.

yknow. tdy, i had a horrid time looking for the ~~police post~~. it was like walking in the sahara desert but with birds flying overhead and cars zooming past and i was like hundred miles away from the police post. ZOMG.

i walked and walked and walked thinking that it was near (just how stupid can i get), and i only got there like after twenty minutes walking. okay not really la. say fifteen. with my BITING SLIPPERS, i walked from ten mile junction to choa chu kang north/south(?) neighbourhood police post. WTF? it was at block 100+ and the numbers ran from three digits to double digits halfway. BENGAP BIN BODOH BLOCKS! and when i reached there, i was perspiring like a mad dog! maybe not so bad. but still! shit, i hate that area. after like what seemed like ages dealing with the police woman cos i had to change address, i was finally done. i gave up walking and took lrt back home. the fifteen minutes of frantically walking and madly perspiring was actually possible without it all with only 5 minutes lrt ride for only 40CENTS! ballz.

to top it all, when i got home, i realised it was all a waste and got scolded instead! all because of the stupid "BLK" word in front. WTF?! the scolding was so uncalled for and we had to make another trip to the same freaking police post just to change it. crackpot old fool. ):

and the same police woman got irritated cos she had to redo it again. EXCUSE ME! it's your job, dont show irritating irritation lah! like im not irritated by the fact that i got scolded and my feet was blistering and and braved the sun and the wind just to come and find your tiny little hideout. HMPFT.

that was one. from the police post, we drove to bbdc. ZOMG. one crazy troublesome thing. i entered the place and since it was gonna rain i had to get it done quick. so i approached the info counter, and asked where to apply for the basic theory test. she asked me so many questions like whether its my first time there, what test would i like to take, auto or manual, private or school candidate, singaporean? OMG. do i look mongolian to you?! FINALLY she told me to go to a computer and fill in some online form before coming back to her and take a queue number. my god. she could have made her job easier and my limited time more fully utilised by just telling me to go to the computer and come back here to get the queue number. that would take only 5 seconds to say! on the computer screen, it had all the questions she asked. OH MY SUNDAE!

i thought when i was through with the queue number and seeing the woman, i was done! BUT GUESS WHAT! the queue number would just entitle me to getting a sticker with my name pasted on a green card. that's it. i had to go to another station to deposit money in to some account where they deduct money from whenever i apply for a test or sth. ZOMG. after depositing, i had to move over to ANOTHER station to book my test date. HOLY. THAT'S LIKE 6 STATIONS WITHIN THE PLACE. to my dismay, i couldnt even book a test date cos the earliest available test dates falls during mid years. GRR. just because almost everything in singapore is self explanatory, what is the point if everything is made difficult. tsk tsk tsk.

by the way, i look perfectly singaporean.

ohya! this friday is the last day of the month! (: YAY. delightfully looking forward to it.

p/s. hope your dad is fine. (:

LOVE!